Legal Stuff: Starring!!!!! Ash, Misty, Brock, Pikachu, Jessie, James, Meowth, Satoshi, Kasumi, Takeshi, Pikachu, Musashi, Kojiro, Nyasuu, and maybe some more!!!!! Anyway, they're all copyright to Nintendo, GameFreak, CREATURES, 4KidsEntertainment, SoftX? TVTokyo?........etc.??? This is an AMETEUR and nonprofit work that is not intended to infringe on any other author's work. Thank you! Time for some insanity. Watch out for falling riceballs, and small-brained Ash's. Rated: PG Genre: Light started: 12/1/00 finished:12/2/00 modified: Squashed Doughnuts and Exploding Riceballs by Blue9Tiger (The evil heartless narrator, which happened to be the evil heartless author of this perverted fanfiction, came across a sign, that read Pallet Town. The evil heartless narrator which happened to be the evil heartless author of this perverted fanfiction that came across a sign that read Pallet Town put another sign that said Masara Town. The evil heartless narrator which happened to be the evil heartless author of this perverted fanfiction came across a sign that read Pallet Town put another sign that said Masara Town and put them together. The evil heartless narrator, which happened to be the evil heartless author of this perverted fanfiction, came across a sign that read Pallet Town, put another sign that said Masara Town and put them together, and made the introduction go a bit longer) "WAAUUUUUUUGHHHHHH!!!!! I can't read this!!!!!!" Ash was faced with the toughest obstacle of life: reading a town's entrance sign. "WAAUUUUGHHH! How can I go into the town if I don't know what town it is?!! WAUGHHHHHHHH!!!" "Will you stop saying "waugh"? What kind of word is it, anyway?!" demanded Misty. "It's an Ashian word!" piped Brock, who kept on piping so much that Pikachu stuck a mute in Brock's mouth. "Mmmmmmrmmmmmffffffmmmfffff!!!!" "Pipe down!" Brock nodded, and started humming in the tune of a pipe, humming down the scale. But Misty ended his solo, and Ash suddenly appeared out of nowhere with a dictionary. "Uhhh....the sign has a bunch of lines, so I'll look up "line"!" Misty and Brock moaned, seeing that the sign was in Japanese, but Ash looked up the word line. "Line: An in---fi----nite----- huh?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????" "Chu???" "Get those question marks out of there! It's our line, now! Prepare for trouble!!" "We'll make it long, and we'll make it double!" "To protect-----" "Lets ditch 'da motto fah now! We got Pikachu 'ta catch!" "PIkaaa!" See you stupid freaks later! I'm going to watch those programs that the Ghost Gang watch. "Team Rocket! Not you again! I wanna read this sign!" "It's in Japanese!" explained Jessie. Then, the trouble started. Brock started to cook "doughnuts", and then suddenly, the sign became readable even for an illiterate person. "Ma-------sar-----a---Town? Who's Sara?" "Nani kore?!" "Ahhhhhh! It's Ash's evil clone!" "BAKA!" "He looks kind of like Ash!" "Duh, you eyeless freak!" "EYELESS FREAK?!! WHO ARE YOU CALLING AN EYELESS FREAK?!!" "YAMERO!" screamed the Ash "clone". "Boku wa Satoshi!" "WAUUUUUGHHHHHH! IT"S MY EVIL CLONE!" shouted Ash, stupidly. Satoshi sweated, and Kasumi, Takeshi, and Pikachu came. Misty and Kasumi saw each other, and screamed because they saw how unattractive they were. "AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!" Takeshi and Brock saw each other, and started cooking up a storm. They cooked up such a storm that their pot melted, and the pot spilled rice and doughnuts all over the place. It became a mess, and attracted Musashi and Kojiro. "Nanda kanda to kikare tara!" "Wauuuuuughhhhhhhh! Jessie and James--are you talking?!" "We're not! Ahhhhhhhh! We're separated from our bodies!" "Disembodied dysfunctional....." "Dis-INTEGRATED!!!!!" screamed Jessie, whacking Meowth into Nyasu. "Nyyaaaaaa!" "WHat 'da------'dere are two 'a me!" "Nyyasuuu-naaaaaa??!!" Both their eyes bulged so far they popped out, and Meowth was desperately looking for his eyes. When Ash saw their eyes on the floor, he threw up, then his Squirtle came out of the PokéBall to clean the mess but choked Ash with so much water he threw up again, then Squirtle did it again, and Ash continued to throw up. Finally Misty couldn't take it anymore and made him go jump into the lake of doughnuts. Ash protested because he said that he didn't want to be thrown into jelly. Satoshi, being meaner than Ash, kicked him into the lake of doughnuts, shouting, "Gaki kuso!" "Wauuuuuuuughhhhhh!" screamed Ash as he crashed into the lake of doughnuts, and came out squeaky clean. "Hey! I ought to try that!" Brock exclaimed, and threw his doughnut on James, which, because it was a squashed doughnut, naturally, splattered. James turned red from embarassment, besides white and blue and purple from the squishy jelly. Jessie cleaned James off, and screamed, "You ignoramous! It's only in the lake of doughnuts where its clean!!" "How was I supposed to know that?!!" "It says here in this script?!" "What script?!!" "Nani yo??!!" Musashi ran over to the script and couldn't read it, so she tore it up. Jessie's eyes bulged, but she kept them in her head. "What did you do that for?!!" Musashi made a "hmmph" sound, and was angry at the others, and pulled out a rifle. Kojiro joined her. "Shine, tiny boys!!" "I'm not a boy!" protested James. "WHAT?!!!" Jessie screamed. "How could you keep that from me, James?!!" "I said......I'm not a boy, I'm a man!" Musashi and Kojiro aimed the rifle, but then...... (The evil heartless narrator, which happened to be the evil heartless author of this perverted fanfiction, came across a sign that read Pallet Town, put another sign that said Masara Town and put them together, and made the introduction go a bit longer, and stuffed doughnuts and riceballs into the gun barrel) "Eeewwwwwwww!" Screamed Misty. "Something went splat!" Musashi had shot Ash in the face, and he went off to dive into the lake of doughnuts. Brock still wanted to try that, and threw James into the lake of riceballs, but he heard a , because that didn't get James clean, but they exploded, and he was covered in white rice. Suddenly, Professor Oak and Dr. Okido came running towards the rice, and gobbled it up before you could say, "dinnertime". Then they ate all the ones on the floor, and the ones in Musashi and Kojiro's rifles. They then biked away, and ran into some Dugtrio. Takeshi had enough of the total tranquiliity that I'm sure is driving everybody completely crazy, so he made some more riceballs, and put them into a soft bomb, and put it on Brock's head. "Ahhhhhh!" All that rice attracted Professor Oak and Dr. Okido again, and they came running towards the rice and after eating it, rode away on their bikes only to encounter some more Dugtrio, who used Magnitude. "Ooooowww!" "Itttaiiiiii!" Musashi and Kojiro decided to change their weapon and were now using squashed doughnuts, and firing at Meowth, because they thought he was a tiny boy. "Wa-wa-wa-wa-wa---ahhhhhh!" "Roketto Dan......yamero!" "Doushite, Satoshi?!" demanded Kasumi. "Zakkenyo!" he ordered, and Kasumi smacked him. "Why are we even fighting, anyway?" "It says so in the script! Wait, the girl who looks like me tore it up!!" Jessie yelled. Musashi and Kojiro started shooting doughnuts again, and this time filled with rainbow jelly, and suddenly, it started to rain doughnuts that were squashed and riceballs that exploded, and James and Kojiro ate them up like crazy. They gorged on them so fast that Jessie and Musashi thought they would get fat, but they didn't, because I am the evil heartless---(WHACK) Suddenly, Ash came back, and threw up because he saw the sight of all those doughnuts and riceballs. Squirtle came out from the Ball and choked him with water again, and Ash was about to throw up, but Misty, Kasumi, Brock, Takeshi, Jessie, Musashi, James, and Kojiro rushed Ash to the bathroom, which was made out of doughnuts, and they collapsed on top of them. "Pikaaaaaaaaaaaa!" Ash! You're not dead yet?!! "Dare?" "Pikkkkkkaaaaaa!" Okay, Ash, if you're dead, I'm leaving for Half-HP studio! "Wait, Pikachu! I'm not dead!" "Pi!" Damn! Suddenly, Satoshi's Pikachu ran to Ash's Pikachu and shocked him. "Chhhhhhuuuu!!!!!!" "Pikkkkkkaaaaa?!!" What did you do that for?! The other Pikachu pointed at the script, and Pikachu read the company that was in charge of putting the script together. "Chhhuuu-Pikaaaaa----Chhuuuuu......." Rights reserved by Riceballs Inc. "We put the balls in rice! Both Pikachu fainted, and Satoshi picked up his and shouted, "Ike, Pikachu!" "Chhhhhuuuu......Pika.........." Iie, Iie........ "What are you twerps doing now?!" Jessie growled. None of them answered, so Jessie borrowed Musashi's gun and drew something on the doughnut. Then she shot it into the air, hoping it would land on Mandarin Island where Butch and Cassidy were. She and James opened their ears to hear the effect: "DAMN THAT JESSIE IF I EVER GET MY HANDS ON THAT BITCH I'LL SHOVE THAT DOUGHNUT UP HER BIG ASS AND KICK IT TO HELL WHERE IT'LL BURN ALL THE SHIT THAT ACCUMULATED IN IT!!!!!!" (Suddenly, the evil heartless author---(WHACK)---walked to Cassidy and whispered,) "We need to keep our voices down. Inside voice." "OH GO TO HELL!!" (Cassidy kicked the evil heartless-----(WHACK) Back at the terrible scene of chaos........ ^_-;; Satoshi decided that they would do something constructive, and gave Ash a dictionary. "What's this?" Satoshi fell over, conveniently into the riceballs. The riceballs exploded, because that's what the evil heartless narrator said that they would do, and Jessie became very ticked off, and rang 12:00, which meant that there were only a few more kilobites left to spend on this terrible fic. "Stop triggering those riceballs, or the stampeding Wigglytuff will get their dainty feet wet!" "Pukurin?!" Kojiro wanted to be ready for the stampeding Wigglytuff, and threw his Ball. "Metadogasu!" "Metttttaaaaa......" "Weezing, go!" Somehow, Weezing was eating doughnuts, and Metadogasu was eating riceballs. "Hey, I get it!" shouted Brock. "You're 'gonna get it if you touch my breasts again!" screamed Misty. "Okay, okay..." Brock conceded. "These are our other selves!" "Ewwwww...I'm that ugly?!" screamed Misty. "Hai!!" agreed Musashi. "See, twerp, even riceball shooting girl thinks you're ugly!" "If these are our other selves, the only way we'll be one again and not two is by---" "Killiing ourselves?" asked Ash. "No." "Chu!" Shimatta! "Did you notice when Metadogase got close to Weezing, they were eating at the same speed?" "Go away, twerp, you're scaring me!" James coaxed. "Here, just listen to Tracey!" "NNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO !!!!!!!!!!!!!" Because Tracey was there, Kenji came, and greeted in a friendly voice: "Ohayo!" "KENJJIIIIIIIII!!!!!!!!" screamed Kasumi. "Hey, Tracey, sketch a Squirtle." Takeshi caught on, unlike when it comes to girls, and whispered in Kenji's ear: "Zenigame....." Kenji nodded, and both Tracey and Kenji drew Squirtle at the same pace, with the same wide smile, the same eyes, the same red headband, and at the same speed, and they slowly drew closer together, and then formed into the same........person.....AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! "Kenji.....! Kenji!! Chikusou!" "What's wrong, Ash2-----wait a second......oh, noooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!" "Boku wa Satoshi!!!!!" "TWO ASHES?!!! I'M GOING CRAZY!" Tracey shouted, jumping into the lake of doughnuts, and went away. "Jaaa naaaaaaaaaa!" "Now we have to synchronize ourselves!" Brock announced, and started piling rocks. Takeshi piled rocks also, and then they came back together again. By this time, Ash threw up, but Satoshi couldn't throw up, so he looked sad. Misty and Kasumi started to swim, and they came back together. Pikachu Thundershocked a tree, and came back together. And Professor Oak and Dr. Okido crashed into Dugtrio at the same time, and came back together, but was thorougly crushed, and he walked into his laboratory looking like a pancake. Ash lay down on Pikachu, and Satoshi did the same, and came together. But Team Rocket was different. "I don't want to merge into that girl! She shoots guns!" "We shoot ice guns, not bullet guns!" "Weah total wimps!" Then Nyasuu walked to Meowth and put his paw on his shoulder, going into a long soliloquy that they had to exist as one and not two, and took so long to say that the Dugtrio that Professor Oak crashed into de-evolved into Diglett. When he was done, Meowth agreed, and went into a Fury Swipe position, and they merged. Jessie looked at Musashi, admiring how beautiful Musashi looked. They shook hands, and merged. James and Kojiro started to shoot each other with doughnuts with the rifles, and, because their aim wasn't together and the exploding riceballs that were raining onto their heads got in the way and ended all seriousness of this fic whatsoever, it took a periscope that wasn't even supposed to be on a gun to make them aim right and shoot, and finally, they came back together, but by then the Diglett had evolved into Dugtrio again. The next day, Ash, Misty, and Tracey, minus Brock who Ash sent to a psychiatric ward because he forgot how to make doughnuts, were walking, like they always did, to a new town, and to new adventures on the horizon like the narrator that's not the evil heartless author (WHACK) always says. They met with someone familiar. "Prepare for trouble!" "Make it double!" "To protect the world from devestation!" "To unite all peoples within our nation!" "To denounce the evils of truth and love!" "To extend our reach to the stars above!" "Jessie!" "James!" "Team Rocket, blast off at the speed of light!" "Surrender now or prepare to fight!" "Meowth, 'dat's right!" "Come on, Team Rocket! We 'gotta get to-----Somewhere Town!" "Not until we blast you to the Moon!" snarled Jessie, taking out an automatic, James imitating her. "Huh?! They're real guns!" "Hahahaaaaaa! We listened to our "other selves" and bought us some lead!" "You wouldn't shoot innocent kids...would you?" asked Ash, sweating. "No.....but you're not innocent!" shouted James, and he fired. And because I'm the evil heartless narrator, which happened to be the evil heartless author of this perverted fanfiction, came across a sign that read Pallet Town, put another sign that said Masara Town and put them together, and made the introduction go a bit longer, and stuffed doughnuts and riceballs into the gun barrel, and you know the rest........) And the twerp trio were perfect targets for Professor Oak, who was ready for dinner. Jessie, James, and Meowth started to sweat, watching Professor Oak chase Ash, Misty, Tracey, and Pikachu into the rain of squashed doughnuts and exploding riceballs. THE END ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- CQF? Thanks for reading this-----pointles......fic! Can ya tell I'm hungry? Well, I hope you anti-anti-AAM are happy........I've exhausted all my ideas for at least one hour........(groan) And now for the week's forecast: Bliizzards of Ash in a Rocket uniform fighting a Vulpix, Team Rocket being political, and Blackthorn City destroyed. And the original Team Rocket take a well-deserved vacation. (groan) There. My ideas are gone. Whew........see ya next time, 'cause this is Blue9Tiger, signing off!