The Passions of all Our PokeChildren’s Days

	Disclaimer: I own everything!!! Uh....except Ash....and Misty, and Brock, and Pikachu....oh
yeah! And Pokemon! O.o; I once owned gum....don’t know what happened with that....damned
terrorists...


	Last time on The Passions of all Our PokeChildren’s Days... 
 “Ok,” Ash began, “My father is............................A SPACE ALIEN! SPOOOOOOKY!!!”
	Misty was about to choke him again, but Ash waved his hands in front of her. 
	“Mist, please don’t kill me! I’m sorry!” He pleaded.
	“Just tell us who the hell your father is you brat!” Misty screamed.
	“Ok, the truth is...I don’t know who my father is! Isn’t that great? Heh heh....” Ash
explained.
	“ARG!!!!” Misty attacked him and started choking him again. Brock just stood leaning
against the wall watching Ash try to escape her evil clutches of death.
	“WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!”

	Ch.3 HeadLights

	“Ack!! Misty! Stop!!” Ash cried out in pain.
Ash was laying on the floor holding onto one of the table legs for dear life. Misty had her sharp and
filthy nails digging into Ash’s ankles as she tried to drag him over to a nearby window.
	“GOD! Stop overreacting! What do you think I’m going to do? Kill you?” Misty asked as a
sly smile appeared across her face.
	Ash nodded furiously. “Y-y-y-your gonna th-throw me out that window you BIKE-
POSSESSIVE- RED-HAIRED-BUG-HATING-UGLY-MAN-ISH-FREAK-FACE!!!” Ash yelled a
bit terrified. 
	Misty tightened her “Mini Misty Death Grip”, as she called it, around Ash’s ankles. 
	“What did you just call me? I am NOT a BIKE-POSSESSIVE-RED-HAIRED-BUG-
HATING-UGLY-MAN-ISH-FREAK-FACE!!!” Misty shouted over Ash’s load sobs of anguish.
	“I WAS only going to dangle you over the edge, but know I’m gonna throw you out the
window, run downstairs, get in my car, and run you over until you look like scrambled Togepi!”
	Ash gave her a look of genuine fear, but it suddenly changed to a bizarre constipated look.
He squeezed his eyes shut and bit down as hard as he could on his lower lip.
	Misty loosened her ‘Mini Misty Death Grip’ and stared at him with a funny expression.
	“Uh...Ash? What-what exactly are you doing? Oh! Well...uh....if you have to....you
know...uh...use the bathroom...we can finish this later.” Misty said; she looked extremely disgusted.
	Ash managed to open one eye and looked up at Misty. 
	“Uh...no it’s not that.” Ash continued to bite his lip and it began to bleed.
	“Well, then what-what in hell are you doing?!” Misty asked, her eyes lighting up with
confusion.
	“I’m....trying to set your head on fire...with my mind....” Ash responded.
	Misty blinked a few times. She was about to follow through with her earlier plan of tossing
him out the window, but Brock interrupted her.
	“Ash,” Brock began, “I’m a bit confused. What exactly is ‘Ketchum Corp’?”
	Misty let go of Ash as he began to stand up. He walked over to Brock who was casually
leaning against a wall.
	“Brock-O,” Ash started as he raised a finger, “does....this hurt?!” Ash quickly jabbed his
index finger into Brock’s left eye.
	Brock stumbled backward clutching what used to be an eye...sort of.... “GOD! WHY?!
WHY ASH?! WHY?!” Brock sobbed.
	Ash shrugged. “Well, I didn’t know if that was an eye, or...maybe a scab...possibly a dead
Caterpie....”
	Brock looked furious. With one hand Brock grabbed Ash and lifted him off the ground, the
other hand was concealing his mutilated eyeball. 
	“Uh....sorry Brock,” Ash tried to comfort, “I didn’t think it was an actual eye....”
	Brock’s angry expression shifted into a sad and pathetic one. Tears began to form in his
remaining eye and he set Ash back down. Brock wiped some of the tears away and walked to a
corner where he curled up into a ball and rocked himself back and fourth. 
	“Not a real eye...” Brock sniffled, “Probably have to wear a patch....there goes patch
boy...has to wear a stupid patch....hmm...yeah that’s what they’ll say....awww patch boy can’t get a
date...poor patch boy...doesn’t have real eyes...Patchy-Patch Patchson...looks like a palm
tree....green and orange don’t mix...used to be a girl...” Brock continued to mumble to himself.
	Both Misty and Ash sweatdropped. 
	“Uh...so Ash what is ‘Ketchum Corp.’? And, why were people after your mom? Oh, and
now how are we supposed to find out who your father is?!” Misty questioned; she raised an eyebrow
to Ash.   
	Ash ran over to the table and jumped on top of it, but unfortunately for him, the table had
been recently waxed and he slid right off.  As he hit the floor, the whole room shook.
	“Uh, Ash?” Misty wasn’t particularly worried about him, but felt she should say something.
	Ash instantly jumped up from the floor and saluted Misty.
	“The answer to your questions is this,” Ash began, “Ketchup, drugs, pickles!” Ash smiled.
	Misty’s brain hazed over with disarray. She just couldn’t understand why Ash was so
stupid!!
	“What are you talking about?” Misty sighed.
	“What do you mean? I answered your questions,” Ash replied. He gave her the thumbs up.
	Misty’s face was getting red as she tried to hold back her rage. “Ugh....erg...ASH! What does
ketchup, drugs, and pickles have to do with anything I asked you?!” Misty shouted.
	Ash looked at her with a surprised look. “Well, they have to do with just about everything!
DUH!” Ash “z-snapped” in Misty’s face. “God, your dumb! I guess I’ll have to explain...” 
	

Meanwhile...

Gary still stood on his front porch. He had been out there since Ash left and was still shifting his
eyes. 
	Gary was murmuring something to himself. “......plans.....plans....plans....plans....” He
suddenly snapped out of it, but then started murmuring something....else.
	“.....spy....spy...I Spy....my spy...spy...spy....”

Back with Ash, Misty, and Brock...

	Brock continued to rock himself back and forth in his corner as Ash and Misty talked
amongst themselves. He too was murmuring something only he could hear.
	“...revenge...revenge...revenge...revenge....”



End Ch.3 HeadLights