~Divided and Confused~
Chapter Five
by cultnirvana

Brock walked into the room, where Ash lay on his back upon his bed.

Ash was confused after talking to and spending time with Misty the night before, wondering why he was beginning to think about her in that way and did he really feel something for her. He hadn’t heard his friend enter the room.

Trying not to startle Ash, he spoke. “I’m about to start dinner. What are you in the mood for?”

His friend didn’t move, but answered quietly back. “I’m not really that hungry.”

Brock understood why he was not, and decided to let Ash know that. He couldn’t let him lay in here all day, trying to figure this out. “I can understand why.”

That got Ash’s attention. He sat up on the bed and for the first time looked towards Brock. “What do you mean?”

“I’ve had my share of girl problems too. I guess you could call me an expert.”

“How did you know?”

“I’ve noticed the way you’ve been behaving lately. I recognize the signs. Your in love.”

“Shhh. Someone might hear you.”

Brock now knew he was right and with a smug look on his face he told Ash, “Don’t worry. Misty went out for a few messages. That’s why I took this opportunity to talk to you. I thought you might need a little help.”

“Help with what?”

“Don’t pretend with me. I know what’s going on. You’ve started dating someone who you are developing feelings for, but now, to mess everything up, there’s someone else in the picture who you think you may have stronger feelings for. The only problem is that this other girl happens to be your best friend." He finished sarcastically, “which just causes even more confusion.”

Ash sighed. “Why do these things have to happen to me?”

“Your a teenager, Ash, that’s why. No one survives their teenage years without a few hiccups along the way. If you didn’t have the problems, you would not be able to survive when your an adult. It’s all a part of life, and it makes the good times even better.”

“Well, I can’t wait to become an adult if I have another six years off this to come.”

“You’re just going to have to.” Brock let out a small laugh.

Ash, a little angrily, said “Hey, don’t laugh. I feel bad enough already.”

“God, am I glad I’m no longer a teenager.”

“Well, I am and I need some help to sort this out.”

“All I can do is give you some advice, a little help. Then you’ll have to make the decisions yourself. If I made them for you, you’d be cheating life. So tell me, what’s going on in that brain of yours?”

“Well, at the beginning of this week, everything was going great. I was having the best time with Stasi. She's so fun and I’m really happy when I’m with her, plus she really likes me too.

" But then, for the past few days, I’ve been realizing how great my friendship with Misty has become. We rarely argue now, and when we begin to, it stops quickly, and we have been confiding in each other much more than ever, telling each other deeply personal stuff. We went out and sat up quite late last night, just chatting about anything on our minds, and I can't remember when I'd been so happy. She’s very beautiful, too. I’ve always had a bit of a crush on her, but lately it has become something more ... intense.”

“It seems like you would much rather be with Misty than Stasi.”

“Yeah, but I’m not sure why these feelings are creeping up now. I know that being with her is not possible.”

“What do you mean not possible?”

“Come on, Brock, you know. Me and Misty have been friends for four years now. We’re too close for anything to happen, and I don’t want to damage our friendship, especially as we have become so close. Anyway, I don’t think she notices I exist in that way. She usually goes for older guys, the intellectual type, who are tall and strong. I’m not overly tall and I’m not that strong. I’m sure she doesn’t feel for me the way I do for her.”

This put Brock in an awkward position. He knew that Misty did indeed have feelings for Ash, and, in fact, that she was in love with him, but if he told him, he would be intervening much more than he wished to. He hoped that the two would come together without any outside stimuli. He didn’t want to force anything. But with their feelings for each other, Brock was sure that eventually something would happen for them to come together.

“You’re her closest friend, that means you’re half-way home.”

“But that is the main problem. If I tell her how I feel, I could possibly lose that friendship and it means too much to me to jeopardize it. But I still have feelings for her, and no matter what I do, they’ll never go away. I have to stop denying them and pretending it’s something else.”

“Well then, you have to decide between your options. You could travel the safe road with Stasi, someone who does make you happy and who has feelings for you. Or, you could take a chance, and risk something dear. If you asked Misty out, there could be one of two outcomes; she has no feelings for you and perhaps your friendship will decay a little, or maybe she feels for you the same way you do for her. The friendship you value so dearly will evolve to the next level, and you will have achieved one of your dreams.

"So is it safety; a fun relationship with a girl who you know cares about you? Or will you take a chance; will you risk what you already have for something that would become better than anything else possibly could? The more risk there is in things, the more you get back, but at the same time there is more to lose.”

“I don’t know. I’m all mixed up. I don’t have as strong feelings for Stasi as I do for Misty, but at the same time I love Misty so much that I'm not prepared to do anything that could end what we already have for some romantic fantasy of what could be." Ash grabbed the sides of his head. Argh, I hate this.”

“I know you do. But you have to make your decision quickly. You can’t kept trailing Stasi around if you still have those doubts in your head. It’s not fair to her. If you hesitate and then decide to tell Misty how you feel, you’ll break Stasi’s heart. Whatever you do, you need to do it now before things get too serious with her.” He paused for a minute before beginning again. “Do you want me to leave you alone a little while to think?”

“No,” Ash replied, but then he just sat there for a moment on the bed, staring into space. Brock could see he was trying to figure out what to do. “I don’t think I can risk it. Misty means too much to me. It’s hard but I have to face the fact that I can never be with her.”

At that moment Misty came back into the apartment. Seeing no one about, she came into the bedroom. “Hi, guys.” She saw the seriousness on their faces, something that was quite rare for them two. “What’s wrong? Is everything alright?”

Brock answered. “Don’t worry. We were just talking.”

“Mano O mano, I suppose.”

“I guess,” Ash said, with a sadness in his eyes as he looked at her beautiful face.

Misty handed the bag she had been carrying to Brock. “I got all the messages. So what are you going to make?”

“I’ve still to figure that out. You can help me.”

“Okay.” She walked out of the room leaving the guys alone again.

Brock looked up to Ash again, and said, with a little regret, “You’ve really grown up lately. That was a very hard decision to make.” Brock smiled at his friend, then left the room and followed Misty to the kitchen.

Ash lay back down on his bed and just stared at the blank ceiling. He knew he had made the right choice, the only problem was that the riskier path, if everything turned out for the best, would have been so much better.

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