'Why?'
By cultnirvana

*********************************************

***Chapter 4– The Little Angel***



The wait was killing him. He’d always been an impatient person, and now, waiting to meet the person that he was sure would become the most important being in his life, the seconds seemed to drag like hours, each slowly making way for the next. He was sure he’d never spent a longer hour in his life.

He looked towards Misty, who was sitting about a meter from him. She had been quiet for nearly the whole hour, staring off into the distance, no doubt thinking about what had just happened. He again studied the face he had loved, those features he had always become so lost within. He began to feel them work their old magic, but the wounds she had inflicted kept him from falling again.

She sensed his eyes upon her, and for one of the rare times since they had meet again she looked at him, staring deep into those puppy dog brown eyes. He was a perfect picture of maturity apart from those large, innocent orbs. She had spent many a night gazing into them, seeing the love they once held for her, but now she wondered whether they would ever contain that emotion again. Then she realised he was staring back into hers, intently, however she could not understand what emotion they conveyed. They seemed so...confused.

For moments they peered into each others eyes, trying to remember the person they had loved so much.

But a knock broke the search.

They both jumped, quickly looking away from each other, subtly blushing from the intensity of the moment.

Misty glanced at the clock. Quarter past eight. “ That should be them,” she told him, nervously.

The excitement began to rise again within him, if it had ever really died down. He began to shake slightly, unsure of what to do and what may happen. What if his daughter refused him? What if she never accepted him as her father? What if two years was too long? Would she even know who he was? Misty had told him that she had told Aya about him, showed her photographs, but wasn’t reality different to a 2D image? But then if she didn’t know who he was, why did she wave at him hours before? There had to have been some recognition then.

He looked to Misty again, but she had moved. He turned to the door through which he’d first entered the apartment, and noticed her exiting, slowly closing the door over behind her. Voices came from the hallway, one was Misty’s, the other must have been their child’s.

The shaking became worse. He could barely keep his hands from quaking. The door began to slowly open. He instantly directed his vision back to the small room, afraid to keep his attention on the door. He heard the soft footfalls behind him move to his left side, and Misty came back into his vision.

She looked to her side, saying, “ Aya, I’d like you to meet someone.” The emotion was evident in her beautiful voice. “ This is Ash, your father.” She motioned for the little girl to come to her side, and with a gaiety of movement she ran into her mother’s arms, but stared straight into Ash’s face, her blue eyes full of joy, but also bewilderment.
Aya looked towards her mother, as if asking permission for something. Misty just nodded, desperately trying to contain her tears. Still the same old Misty, Ash thought, never able to allow others to see her weak. It had taken him years to break through her facade.

She turned again to her father, and took a few steps towards him, stopping mere inches away, her childish smile growing.

He apprehensively lifted his hand towards her face and delicately touched her tender cheeks, then pulled his fingers through her thick hair. It felt weird. It was his blood that ran in her veins, his DNA that made half of her. His baby. His daughter. He could feel it in the touch.

“ Daddy?”

It seemed like half a question, half statement, and the voice was like an angel’s. She knew him, recognised him. He glanced at Misty. Her emotions had overwhelmed her, as well, at the solitary word. Her hand covered her mouth, and new tears dropped from her eyes.

Ash brought his attention back to his daughter, and in a sudden impulse, took the child into his arms, holding her tightly against his chest.

“ Yeah. It’s me. It’s me.”

*********************************************


He carried Aya in his arms into her bedroom, setting her onto her bed, tucking the sheets comfortably around her. Almost everything was blue, probably because of Misty’s influence upon her, and tens of Pokemon teddies lined the floor. “ So, who’s your favourite Pokemon?” he said, looking at the toys.

“ I like water Pokemon, like mummy, but Pikachu is the cutest,” she replied with that beautiful childish tone.

“ Oh.” Ash looked at Misty, standing by the door of the bedroom, and give her a tender grin, the first truly tender look he’d directed towards her all night. She returned it. Ash glanced back towards the teddies, picking up a Pikachu among the bunch. He handed it to Aya, who hugged it tightly. “ So why do you like Pikachu so much?”

“ He’s yellow and has big ears. You have a Pikachu, daddy?”

“ Well, I did. Come on, it’s getting late and you need to get some sleep. Isn’t that right, mummy?”

“ Yeah, and Aya, you have to get up early to go to day-care while mummy’s at work.”

“ Ah, Misty, could I look after her tomorrow? I’d love to spend a little more time with her. We haven’t had much tonight.”

“ Please mummy, could daddy mind me?” The strangeness of those words didn’t diminish to him, no matter how many times she said them. But the words, especially ‘daddy’, continued to fill him with joy.

“ Of course, honey.” She walked closer to the two. “ But you’ll need to get a lot of sleep, so goodnight, baby.” She kissed her daughter on the forehead, and Aya returned it.

“ Night, mummy. Night, daddy.”

“ Night.” Aya bent forward and kissed him on the cheek. In response, he pulled her into another hug, unsure if he wanted to let her go again. But, sadly, he knew he had to.
Aya cuddled up with her quilt and the Pikachu, and closed her eyes, ready to meet her dreams, while her parents withdrew to the living room, closing the door behind them.
They both sat on the sofa again. Ash turned to Misty and said, “ She’s so adorable. Smart, cute. You’ve really done a great job with her.”

“ Thanks. It isn’t exactly the easiest job in the world.”

“ Well, from now on I’m going to be here to help.”

“ I’m glad. We can finally be a family. Well, at least as close to one as possible. Are you sure you’re going to be okay tomorrow? You haven’t had much experience with kids.”

“ I’m sure you can give me a few tips. Anyway, it’s something I’ll have to get used to. And I can’t wait. I love her so much. She’s our little baby.”

Misty thought back to one of the comments Ash made a few moments before. It raised a great deal of confusion within her. “ Ash, what did you mean when you said you didn’t have Pikachu anymore?”

“ Oh. Well about two years ago, I quit training. I left him and the others at Oak’s laboratory. I visit them a lot, but felt they were better there than with me.”

“ What?! But Ash, training was your life.”

“ You were my life! Without you there, by my side, cheering me on, it didn’t feel right. When you left, my passion for it left too.”

She had not only destroyed his personal life, but also his career. Her inner anguish increased. “ I’m sorry.”

“ Misty, as you said, no matter how many times you say that, it isn’t going to make a different. We can’t change the past few years,” he lowered his voice a little, “ or forget them. All we can do is move forward, raise her together.”

Another momentary silence passed over the room. “ So, what have you been doing for the past while? Where are you living?” she asked awkwardly.

“ In Viridian. I’ve been working in a bar for a few months now. I’m trying to figure out what to do as a career.”

“ You should go back to training, Ash. That’s what you have a real talent for.”

“ I don’t think so.” He paused for a minute. “ What about you?”

“ I’m training to be a Pokemon doctor. I’ve been doing that for about a year and a half now, but I’ve got a few years left. I work down town at the Pokecentre. The need for doctors has increased so the centre now has a few there, including a Nurse Joy.”

“ That was one of your dreams, well after becoming a water Pokemon master.”

“ I’d still love to do that, but I need to pay the bills. Aya’s more important than anything. And perhaps in a couple of years I could go after that old dream again, when she leaves on her journey.”

“ You mean she wants to be a trainer?”

“ Yeah. She may grow out of it, but then again she may do the same as we did.”

“ I’d like her to follow in our footsteps,” he hesitated before continuing, “ at least in some ways.”

“ Yeah,” she replied with a melancholy grin. “ I think I’m going to turn in. I have to work early tomorrow. Do you want to stay tonight? It’s a little late to travel back to Viridian.”

“ As long as you don’t mind.”

“ I’ll get you a spare sheet and pillow, and you can make up the sofa.”

“ Okay.”

She left, and within minutes came back with the stuff she had promised. “ Here you go. I’m not sure if it’ll be too comfortable, but the only other option is the floor.”

“ Remember, we slept on the ground in forests for most of our teenage years. I think a sofa will be okay. I’ll see you in the morning, then.”

“ Goodnight.”

“ Night.”

She again excited the living room, going into the bedroom. He watched her go, while beginning to struggle with the linen.

That day had changed his life irrevocably. It had all been so surreal. One moment he felt so alone in the world, and now he had a daughter, and she was now to be the biggest part of his life. Also, the love of his life would always be there, too. He wasn’t sure how he felt about that fact. Yes, she had hurt him so much, more than any other individual had. She was the one responsible for him missing the first part of his child’s life, but he was happy to be with her again. She awakened his old happy memories of their seven years as best friends, and those of the year they had spent as lovers - the first time they admitted their love for one another, their first kiss, and the night they had lost their virginity together (he blushed remembering how nervous they both had been that first time). But it also brought back the memory of the night she had left, too afraid to tell him she was carrying their baby. Every time he felt the old feelings of love resurface, the contempt arose as well.

*********************************************

If you want to email me, my address is cultnirvana@hotmail.com.

If you would like to review this fic, please go to - http://www.fanfiction.net/read.php?storyid=321187