Disclaimer: I don’t own pokemon or this wouldn’t just be a fanfic it would have happened. Nintendo and Gamefreak own it. I own this story though so don’t steal it!

This is my first fanfic and would like some feedback so if you have any comments or flames e-mail me at funky_magicarp@hotmail.com. I also wouldn’t mind ideas for my next fic. Author’s Note: Um, this is a comedy AAML story. There are no battles in it. Hope you like it.

Dumb-Ash

Narrorator: Our heroes are (as always) lost again. What will they do, where are they, and when will Ash learn to read a map are only a few of the questions on their mind.

Misty: How could you read the map upside down, didn’t you notice the stupid writing was upside down.

Ash: Well its not my fault, I never went to school and never learned about geography.

Misty: Then let Brock read it.

Ash: He can’t even see the stupid map.

Misty: Can too.

Ash: Can not.

Misty: Oh yeah.

Misty pulls a mallet out of nowhere and waves it around.

Ash: N-no I m-mean y-y-your right M-Misty. (Then mutters under his breath) as a matter of fact you always seem to be right when you have that stupid mallet out.

Misty: I HEARD THAT!

WHACK

Ash: WAAAAAAAAAA!

Brock: Cut it out. Look we’re right at a town we’ll just go there and ask where it is.

Ash: Sorry Brock she is just impressible.

Brock: You mean impossible Ash.

Ash: Oh, oops.

Misty: (While blushing and barley whispering) I think Ash’s description is more accurate.

Ash: Did you say acute? I’m confused.

Misty: (Her face redder than Pikachu’s bottle of ketchup) No, but you’re a cutie.

Brock: Oh, I see. Umm Misty, I don’t think he can be interested in girls that way, he hasn’t hit puberty yet, you know.

Misty: Yeah, but I have to try, besides his voice did change after the first few episodes. And we all act way older than our ages anyway.

Ash: Huh? (A common phrase for him)

Misty: Ash, you are so dumb!

Ash: Am not!

Misty: Are too!

Ash: Well at least I’m not scrawny.

Misty: DON’T MAKE ME GET OUT THE MALLET AGAIN, ASH KETCHUM!

Ash: Oh yeah.

Misty: Yeah.

Pikachu: Pii kaa CHUUUUUUUUUU!

Ash & Misty are fried like chicken. (MMMMM Chicken. Oh sorry.)

Brock: Now can we get to town?

Ash: Fine.

Misty: Fine.

When they get close to town Misty and Brock recognize it right away, but Ash doesn‘t.

Misty: Noooo not here. Anywhere but here.

Brock: (Already in “girl mode”) Yes, Yes, Yes, Yes.

Misty: BROCK, DON’T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT, THEY’RE MY SISTERS!

She hits him with her mallet.

Ash: Put that away, already.

Misty: You want a bump on your head too.

Ash: N-no

Misty: THEN SHUT UP.

By the time they actually get to the city it is late.

Ash: Maybe we should get some sleep before we ask where we are.

Brock & Misty face plant with sweat drops.

Ash: What?

Brock & Misty: Never mind.

Brock: So Misty are we sleeping at the gym or the pokemon center?

Ash: What? We can’t stay at the gym, only the gym leaders can.

Brock & Misty sweat drop again.

Misty: Well, I don’t want to face my sisters until I am rested, and I don’t want you sleeping in the same building as my sisters, Brock.

* * *

Brock: Yes, we’re at the pokemon center! Where’s Nurse Joy?

Nurse Joy: Can I get you anything.

Brock: (While drooling) How about a date?

Nurse Joy: Ewwwwww, in your dreams.

Brock: If only you knew.

Ash & Misty are having no luck trying to pull Brock away.

Ash: Pikachu GO!

Pikachu: Pii kaa CHUUUUUUUU!

Brock is now lying on the floor covered in black.

Ash: Uhh Nurse Joy we would like three rooms please.

Nurse Joy: (Winks at Misty) Sorry we can only give you 1, because the carnival is in town and they are filling up fast.

Ash: Ok. I guess.

In the room

Brock: There is barely enough room for on person on the floor so I guess you too can share the bed. (Also winking at Misty)

Misty: (while blushing) Umm all right, I guess.

Ash: Sure, I get the left side!

The next morning

Brock gets up first and wakes up Ash and Misty.

Brock: I got some things I need to check out today, so you guys can do whatever you want.

Ash: Ok.

Misty: Alright (while blushing at the thought of being alone with Ash all day).

Brock: See ya. I’ll meet you at the gym tonight.

Ash: Bye.

Misty: Bye

Misty decides too seize the opportunity and tell Ash her feelings.

Misty: Umm uh Ash I um.

Ash: What is it Misty?

Misty: I uh kinda like you.

Ash: Well, I like you too.

Misty: REALLY!?

Ash: Ya, we’re best friends.

Misty: (while hitting him with her mallet) Ohh your sooo dense.

Ash: WAAAAAAAA, What’s your problem?

Misty: Never mind, let’s just go.

Ash: Ok.

Ash walks up to the nearest stranger

Ash: Umm could you please tell me what city we’re in?

Misty: OHH YOU IDIOT LET’S GO.

Ash: Okay, but how will we find out where we are?

Misty: Never mind, let’s go to that carnival ok?

Ash: Yeah! I love carnivals.

* * *

Misty: Oh Ash, you have to win me that stuffed Tediursa.

Ash: Ok

Ash tries lots of times to win the simple ring toss game until he finally gets the stuffed pokemon.

Ash: Here Misty I finally won it for you.

Misty: Won it?

Ash: Well, um got it.

Misty: Only because the ring toss guy felt sorry for you and gave you it, just like how you get your badges.

Ash: WAAAAAAAAA! (Then after forgetting what they were talking about.) Hey, let’s go on the Ferris Wheel now.

Misty: Okay.

Ticket taker: That’ll be 2 tickets please.

Ash: (While handing tickets to ticket taker) Here you go.

Ash & Misty: Weeeeeeeee

Ash: Huh, why is it stopping?

Misty: I don’t know.

Ticket Taker: (Through a loud speaker) Sorry but we are having some difficulties with the Ferris Wheel please remain calm.

Ash: Oh no, I guess we’re stuck up here. Wow! Look at the view.

Misty: (While staring at Ash) Yeah, it’s amazing.

After being stuck up there for at least an hour arguing non stop Ash finally realizes he could use his pokemon to get down.

Ash: Bulbasaur Go! Use vine whip to make ropes for us to slide down.

Misty: Well, I think that’s enough of this carnival for one day.

Ash: Now where do we go.

Misty: We’ll go to the gym.

Ash: Fine, but I already have 8 badges, so there is no reason.

Misty sweat drops

At the Gym

Misty knocks on the door, and Daisy opens it.

Daisy: Like hi.

Lilly and Violet: Who is it?

Daisy: It’s like the runt and her boyfriend.

Misty: (while blushing) HE’S NOT MY BOYFRIEND! (then hinting at Ash) yet.

Ash: Huh?

Misty, Daisy, Lilly, and Violet all sweat drop.

Ash: Ok I see.

Misty: (A little over excited) Really?

Ash: We’re at Cerilian City.

Misty: You see what I have to put up with?

Daisy: Yeah, but what brings you here.

Misty: Ash, got us lost and brought us here from Saffron, we were there because Ash got challenged by A.J. and thought he had to cream him.

Ash: Well, I did didn’t I.

Misty: Only because his Sandshrew broke it’s leg the day before.

Ash: A win is a win.

Daisy: Well, come on in.

Ash & Misty: Ok

After watching T.V. for a few hours with Misty mysteriously getting closer to Ash.

Ash: Misty, your on my side of the couch.

Misty sighs

Ash: Oh, I get it.

Misty: (Not quite as enthusiastic as last time) You do?

Ash: Your trying to get the remote, well it’s not gonna happen!

Misty: Ash you’re a complete idiot.

Ash: (While absorbed in the pokemon battle on T.V.) What?

Misty: I said I’m going to bed.

Violet: Umm runt er, I mean Misty we kinda turned your bedroom into like a beauty parlor, so you and Ash will like have to share a room. (then winks at Misty).

Misty: HOW DARE YO- (Starts blushing) Oh, um well did you say share a room.

Ash: Alright works for me.

Misty goes upstairs.

Ash finishes watching the battle and goes upstairs

Brock walks in

Lilly: Like hi Brock, you get Misty’s bedroom since like her and Ash are in the guest room.

Brock: (While drooling) Ok Th-Thanks.

In the guest room

Ash: I get the left side of the bed!.

Misty: (blushing) Y-you mean you want to share it?

Ash: Of course! I’m not sleeping on the floor.

The next morning at 6:00 Ash woke up and realized Misty was cuddling him.

Ash: (After staring at her for a long moment he grins evilly.) MISTY WATERFLOWER GET OFF OF ME!

WHACK! Misty, still half asleep, hits Ash with the good ol’ mallet then goes back to sleep still cuddling

Ash: Oww! That hurt Misty

Misty: zzzzzz

Ash: Misty? Oh no she’s asleep.

7:00 that morning Misty wakes up and sees Ash staring at her, then notices she’s on him and starts blushing furiously.

Misty: ASH KETCHUM WHY DIDN’T YOU WAKE ME UP!?

Ash: I DID, YOU JUST WENT BACK TO SLEEP!

Misty: DID NOT!

Ash: DID TOO!

Violet, Lilly, Daisy, and Brock: SHUT UP YOU TWO WE‘RE SLEEPING!

Misty: Well, what are we going to do while their sleeping?

Ash: How about a walk?

Misty: Sure.

When they were getting up they realized Misty was still laying on him and both started blushing.

Ash: Let’s just leave Pikachu here. I don’t want to risk waking him up.

* * *

Ash: I wonder where team rocket we haven’t seen them in like a week.

Voice1: Prepare for trouble.

Voice2: And make it double.

Voice1: To protect the world from devistation.

Voice2: To unite all peoples within our nation.

Voice1: Jessie!

Voice2: James!

Jessie: Team Rocket blast off at the speed of light.

James: Surrender now or prepare to fight.

Ash: Wait a minute! Your team rocket.

Jessie, James, and Misty sweat drop.

Misty: Wait, where is meowth?

Meowth: Right behind ya’s.

Just then Meowth tied them up.

Jessie: Now give us your Pikachu.

Ash: No!

Misty: We don’t even have him here!

James: Darn it! Oh well we would have screwed it up anyway.

Jessie: What do we do with them?

Meowth: Just trow dem in de ditch!

James: Yeah, he he, we’ll ditch them.

Misty: (blushing again) Don’t leave me tied to him!

Jessie: Ooo, she’s blushing.

James: Yeah, looks like the twerp has a girlfriend.

Ash: SHE ISN’T MY GIRLFRIEND!

Misty: (Blushing more than ever) Yeah.

Meowth: Hurry up before da cops come.

Jessie and James throw them in the ditch and leave.

Jessie, James, & Meowth: Looks like Team Rockets running off again.

Misty: Ouch! That hurt.

Ash: Stop whining, it won’t help.

Misty: I’m not whining!

Ash: Are too.

Misty: Am not!

Ash: Are too!

Misty: You just wait until I get untied Ash Ketchum!

Ash: Yeah, then what will you do.

After several hours of arguing Misty has enough, she slips out her hands and grabs her mallet

Ash: WAAAAAA! HEY, YOU COULD HAVE SLIPPED YOUR HANDS OUT AT ANY TIME, WHY DIDN’T YOU UNTIE US HOURS AGO.

Misty: (Now blushing even more than ever) U-um I uh um liked um being tied to you.

Ash: Why? Oh I get it.

Misty: Finally.

Ash: You wanted to make sure Team Rocket was gone.

Misty falls on her face.

Misty: Oh, never mind.

Misty was now untied but Ash wasn’t.

Ash: Ok never mind, just untie me.

Misty: Ummm nope.

Ash: WHY NOT!?

Misty: (Blushing) Well, because ummmm I think your less uhh annoying this way.

Ash: MISTY WATERFLOWER UNTIE ME RIGHT THIS MINUTE!

Misty: What are you going to do about it?

Just as Ash was about to say something Misty stuffs a rag in his mouth.

Ash: Mmm mm mmm mmm m mm mmm

Misty dragged Ash all the way to the Cerilian gym and throws him on the couch.

Brock: Misty, why is Ash tied up?

Misty: Team Rocket.

Brock: Why didn’t you untie him.

Misty: That’s no fun.

Brock: K goodnight.

Misty: Can you help me drag him up to the bed.

Brock: Sure.

After Misty got him upstairs she untied him.

Ash: FINALLY, MISTY WATERFLOWER THAT WAS NOT FUNNY!

Misty: (Trying to stop herself from laughing) I thought it was, you better be quiet my sisters and the pokemon are sleeping.

Ash and Misty then went to sleep. When Ash woke up he found Misty cuddling him again and was about to yell, until he remembered what had happened last time.

About 2 hours later Misty wakes up.

Misty: Good morning Ash.

Ash: Good morning, but could you please get off of me.

Misty: (blushing) Um yeah uh sorry.

Ash: It’s ok.

Misty: Now, what do we do today.

Ash: Well, I dunno but I’m gonna get you back for leaving me tied up like that.

Misty: Only if you can catch me, he he.

Misty then runs off and Ash chases her.

As they run down the road they hear sirens but keep running anyway.

Misty: (While still running) What are those sirens.

Ash: I dunno but I’m gonna get you back!

Officer Jenny: (Blows whistle) STOP RIGHT THERE YOU TWO!

Ash & Misty: Us?

Jenny: Yes you, your under arrest.

Ash & Misty: We didn’t do anything though.

Jenny: Yes you did, you umm, well you violated code 3279!

Misty: What’s that?

Jenny: Um, arguing with an officer.

Misty: But we weren’t arguing until after you arrested us.

Jenny: Keep arguing and you’ll get a bigger charge young lady!

Jenny: (Handcuffs them together) I’m taking you in for questioning.

Ash: WHAT!?

Jenny: (Muttering really quietly so Ash & Misty can’t hear) Squinty better pay me a lot.

Misty: (blushing because she is handcuffed to Ash) What was that?

Officer Jenny: (In a not very convincing voice) I said oops I am so clumsy, I forgot that I lost the key to those while I was chasing you and they fell down the sewer grate. (Then winks at Misty rather obviously so even Ash saw).

Ash & Misty: WHAT!?

Officer Jenny: Sorry, but your still under arrest, let’s go.

At the police station, after Officer Jenny calls Professor Oak and gets the whole mess straitened out.

Officer Jenny: What do you mean you can’t come till Thursday….. Ok bye.

Ash: What did the locksmith say?

Misty and Officer Jenny sweat dropped

Misty: WE CAN’T BE STUCK LIKE THAT FOR 4 DAYS!

Ash: What! 4 days?

Officer Jenny: You guys can leave just be back 6:00 Thursday night or you‘ll have to wait longer.

Ash: Can’t you do something about it now. WAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

Jenny: Stop whining and leave or I’ll make you wait longer.

Ash: Ok Ok.

On the way to the gym

Ash: Now how am I going to have a bath.

Misty: Like you ever do anyway.

Ash: Hey, what’s that supposed to mean.

Misty: That you never have baths.

Ash: Do too!

Misty: Do not.

Ash: Do too!

Misty: Don’t!

Ash: Do!

Misty: Don’t make me get out the mallet.

Ash: Yeah try it.

Misty reaches for the mallet.

Misty: Where is it? Wait. ASH KETCHUM WHAT DID YOU DO WITH MY MALLET!?

Ash: (Sly grin) You mean this.

Ash holds up Misty’s mallet broken in half.

Ash: I decided to steal it when Officer Jenny was on the phone so I would be safe while I’m handcuffed to you.

Misty: (Evil grin) Oh don’t worry, I always keep a spare, and you can’t get away.

Ash: Uh oh.

WHACK

Ash: WAAAAAAAAAAA!

Misty: Finally, we’re at the gym.

Lilly: Oh hi runt.

Violet: Like what’s with the handcuffs?

Daisy: Yeah, he he, like the runt and her boyfriend are like finally hitched.

Misty: HE‘S NOT MY BO-(starts blushing more than ever before) Oh screw it.

Misty gives Ash a huge kiss on the lips.

Ash: Finally.

Misty, Daisy, Lilly, Violet, and Brock: Huh?

Ash: Misty, I was acting dumb this whole time to get you back for using that mallet so much. He he he. Besides you look cute when you’re embarrassed. I knew she liked me before Brock did. I am surprised you guys thought anyone could be that dumb.

Misty: Just you. That’s it, you mean you let me make a fool of myself in front of everyone just because you thought it was funny. I’m gonna get you Ash.

Brock: Well, I guess you don’t need these on anymore.

Brock pulls out the key and unlocks Ash’s and Misty’s handcuffs.

Ash & Misty: Huh?

Ash: You’ve got some explaining to do now Brock.

Brock: Simple, everyone in town was in on it, after Misty told me she liked Ash I got everyone in town trying to get you alone so Misty could tell Ash. I expect to be paid back for all those bribes I made.

Ash & Misty sweat drop.

Ash: You mean you set all of it up?

Brock: Yup.

Lilly: We helped too.

Misty: That was nice of you guys.

Brock: I just wanted you to stop arguing.

Ash: Yeah sooo, Misty, now you can get rid of that mallet, hey?

Misty: No way.

Ash: Yes!

Misty: No!

Ash: (On his knees.) Pretty please with cherries on top?

Picachu: PII KAA CHUUUUUUU!

Misty: (Blushing a lot and whispering so only Brock can hear) Hey Brock, do you think I could buy those handcuffs off of you.

* * *

Ash: MISTY WATERFLOWER YOU GET BACK HERE AND UNCUFF ME RIGHT THIS MINUTE!

Misty: Sorry hun, I’ll be back in a couple of hours, I’ve gotta go shopping.

Ash: Please?

Ash: Misty?

Narrorator: So, Misty is gone shopping, who knows how long that’ll take. Hey, what ever happened to Team Rocket?

James: You think they got together yet.

Jessie: All I know is that they better invite us to the wedding.

Meowth: Ya, dat squinty eyed twerp never paid us for tyin dem up yet.