The Officer Jenny Show!

Disclaimers:

I don't own Pokémon at all!! I also don't own the rights to the "Jerry Springer Show." That belongs to Studios USA. And Jerry Springer, Steve and his security guys don't work for me. In fact, they don't appear in this at all! All Pokémon characters belong to Nintendo, 4Kids Entertainment, the WB and Game Freak.

Writer's Notes:

I'm Mario Alvarado. A new fanfic writer. To become a member on Fanfiction.net was one of my new year's resolutions. And this is my very first fic I have ever posted. I hope you like it.

I decided to write a story using the characters of Pokémon on the "Jerry Springer Show." It has been done before. The twist is that Jerry is not the host! (GASP!!) Officer Jenny arrives at a building to check a Team Rocket sighting saying that Jessie and James were inside A TV studio. She finds Team Rocket, but she finds people in the audience chanting "Jerry!" Then, a producer takes Jenny to a back room to tell her what is going on.

Warning!!!! This fic is not for Misty fans at all. And if you don't like the idea of Ash and Duplica as a pair, you shouldn't read this either. All of the craziness of the Springer Show mixed in with the Pokémon crew in this fanfic. This fic is rated PG-13 for swearing and occasional violence.

In A Prep Room

Jenny: So let me get this straight. A person in the crowd saw Team Rocket and called the police. I come over here to investigate and I find out that Team Rocket are guests of this "Jerry Springer" type show?!

Producer: Yes. But we don't have a host for the show. That means no show is happening.

Jenny: And you are asking me nicely to be the host of the show?

Producer: I know this is on real short notice and I'm really sorry about all of this. But we planned to tape a "Jerry Springer" rip-off and mail it to the WB for their contest.

Jenny: "The Jerry Springer Fan Show Contest?" I've heard of it.

Producer: You have?

Jenny: Hey, I have a life outside of being a cop. I wanted to make one with the other Jennys, but they don't like me that much.

Producer: Sorry to hear that. Why do they don't like you?

Jenny: They own Nintendo 64's, which means they are loyal to that system. I bought a Sony PlayStation. And I also bought a PlayStation 2. God, I love that thing!!

Producer: So, are you willing to help us out?

Jenny: To be on the "Jerry Springer Show" as the grand prize? Hell yeah!!

Producer: Oh, thank you! You saved my production!!! We must get you ready for the show.

Jenny: Um, okay. Can I leave my uniform on?

Producer: Do whatever you want.

Dressing Room

Make Up Lady: How do you get your hair like that?

Jenny: A lot of hair gel. That's it.

Make Up Lady: You're not nervous or anything like that, are you?

Jenny: I AM nervous! I haven't been this nervous since the last shootout I was in.

Make Up Lady: When was that?

Jenny: Last night!

Make Up Lady: Sorry.

(A staff member knocks twice and opens the door.)

Staff Boy: 3 minutes until show time Officer Jenny!!

Jenny: Okay.

The make up lady was finishing up doing Jenny's makeup.

Jenny: Is there anything I need to know about being a host on a talk show?

Make Up Lady: This is like interrogating a suspect. You try to get the necessary information out of them.

Jenny: And if you're lucky, they might say more.

Make Up Lady: There you go. I'm sure you'll be fine.

Staff Boy: 45 seconds!! Let's get moving!!

Make Up Lady: Good Luck.

Jenny: Thanks. I'll need it.

Producer: We only got one shot! So, let's make it a good one!!!

Director: 10-4!

Director #2: Ready to go!

Technical Director: Special effects ready!

Lighting: Let's get busy!!

Music Director: Ready, willing and able!!

Producer: Have a good show Jenny.

Segment #1

(Jenny walks out of the Dressing Room and heads to the back of the stage. The audience is chanting "Jerry! Jerry! Jerry! Jerry!" 15 guys walk onto the stage as the security. Then the theme music starts playing and the Stage Man points Jenny to the stage. Jenny then walks onto the stage and the audience stops cheering.)

Jenny (surprised and a bit annoyed): What?!!

Audience member: Are you the host of the show?

Jenny: I guess. I was looking for Team Rocket members, and then I ran into this producer guy obsessed with winning this "Jerry Springer Show" contest.

Audience member: Just making sure. We are all "Jerry Springer" fans.

Jenny: I can see that. So, let's bring out the first guest!!!

Audience member: There you go!!!!

Audience: Jenny! Jenny! Jenny! Jenny! Jenny!

Jenny: Welcome to the show! The guests that are here today have decided to reveal their deep, dark secrets!!

Audience: Oooohhhhhh!

Jenny: There are no secrets on The Officer Jenny Show!!!! What's wrong with you?!!!

(The Audience starts laughing.)

Jenny: Please meet Ash!!!

(Audience members applaud and stage guys show Ash to the stage and sits down.)

Jenny: Ash, welcome to the show. By the way, how old are you?

Ash: I turned 18, why you ask?

Jenny: Nothing. Now why are you here?

Ash: Well, I'm here to tell my girlfriend of 4 years that I've been seeing someone else.

Audience: BOOOOOOOOOO!

Ash: Hey, shut the hell up!! You don't know me!!! You don't know me at all!! I'll kick all your asses!

Audience: Jackass! Jackass!

Jenny: Are you sick of your girlfriend?

Ash: Yeah! All she does in bitch and moan all the time! I can't stand it anymore!!

Audience: PLAYER!! PLAYER!! PLAYER!!

Ash: SHUT THE HELL UP!!! YOU WOULD DO IT TOO, YOU SON OF A BITCH!!

(The security keeps Ash at bay away from the angry audience.)

Jenny: Yeah right. Now where did you meet this other girl?

Ash: At a popular video game conference in Vermillion City. She's better looking than my girlfriend!! We've been going out for about 1 month and she's really great to be with and... she's great in bed.

Audience: Whoo-hoo!!!!!!

Jenny: All right. You're going to tell her... oh wait! I've been told, she's been watching back stage!!!

Audience: Loser!!! Loser!!! Loser!!!

Ash: Shut up! You [Bleep]!!!!!!

Jenny: Let's bring her out!! Her name's Misty!!

(The audience goes nuts as Misty runs to the stage and starts beating the crap out of Ash. Security comes to pull Misty off of Ash.)

Audience: Jenny! Jenny! Jenny! Jenny!

Jenny: What do you want from me?!

(The audience cracks up laughing as Misty finally sits down and Ash gets up from the beating.)

Jenny: Misty, welcome to the show...

Misty: You scumbag!! I did everything for you!!!

Ash: You keep on bitching and moaning at me all the damn time!!!

Misty: I DO IT BECAUSE I LOVE YOU!!!

Ash: I can't stand the daily name-calling you do at me!!! I almost tried to kill myself last week!!!

Audience: GASP!!!

Jenny: Is that true Ash?

Ash: Yeah. It's true. I almost did it, but my mom stopped me.

Jenny: And your mother's here and she's not happy with Misty right now. Here she is, give it up for Delia!!

Audience: MOM! MOM! MOM! MOM! MOM! MOM!

(Ash's mother makes a beeline for Misty. Another fight erupts and the security guys manage to pry Delia off of Misty.)

Delia: Stay away from my little boy, you psycho!!!

Audience: Psycho!! Psycho!! Psycho!!

Jenny: Um, Delia. Welcome to the show.

Delia: Hi.

Misty: Who are you calling a psycho?!!! At least I'm not sleeping with Prof. Oak!!!!

Jenny: You are?

Delia: No, I am not. He's too old for me anyway.

Misty: I saw you making out with him last week! She's just a gold digger!!

Ash: That's my mom you're talking to!!!

Misty: I don't give a rat's ass!!!

Delia: I am no good digger, whore!!!

Jenny: You know, let's meet the girl that Ash has been seeing!!!!

Audience: YEAH!!!!!!

Misty: You what?!!!

(Duplica comes on the stage and wraps her arms around Ash as he shoves his tongue in her mouth for a little tongue tango. Misty tries to kill Ash with a chair, but Delia tackles her and another giant fight ensues. Security breaks up the fight and more security guys arrive on the stage.)

Jenny: Is this what I signed up for?!!

Audience: Yup!!!

Jenny: Um, welcome to the show and you're name is Duplica?

Duplica: Yes, that's right.

Misty: You're my best friend!!! Why are you sleeping with my man?!!!

Duplica: He's my man now, [Bleep]!!!!

Misty: You filthy whore!! I'll kill you!!!!

(Misty tries another charge at Duplica and Ash, but the security guys keep her at bay.)

Jenny: So Ash, are you saying to Misty that you will not see her anymore?

Ash: Hell yeah!

Delia: Good! Besides, Misty is a psycho bitch! Duplica is a better girl for my Ash.

Audience: Psycho bitch!! Psycho bitch!! Psycho bitch!!

Misty: Just wait until we get back to Pallet!!!!

Duplica: Oh, shut up you [Bleep] whore!!! At least I got your man!!!!

Jenny: Say, Ash. Didn't you want to ask Duplica something?

Delia: Yes. Ask her Ash.

Misty: Ask her what?

Ash: Well... Duplica...

(The crowd starts to go nuts as Misty is being restrained by even more Officer Jenny Show security. Ash kneels in front of Duplica and Ash's mother is about to cry.)

Ash: Duplica. We've only been dating for a month now and I love you like there's no tomorrow!

Misty: Ash Ketchum!! I will rip your [Bleep] nuts off!!

Ash: Will you marry me?!!!

(Ash reached into his pocket and pulled out a diamond engagement ring. Duplica is in total shock. Misty is being handcuffed by security.)

Audience: Marry him!!! Marry him!!! Marry him!!! Marry him!!!

Jenny: Well, what's your answer?

Duplica: Hell yeah!! I always wanted Ash so much, now I got him from that bitch!!!

Misty: NOOOOOOO!!!!! When I get out of jail, feel my wrath!!!

Audience: Deal with it! Deal with it!!

Jenny: Is that it? You're saying yes to his proposal?

Duplica: Of course. I love Ash more than Misty ever did!

Jenny: And Delia...

Delia: It's perfectly fine with me. Just as long as my Ash is finally happy.

Jenny: Are you going to let Misty stop you?

Ash: Hell no!!! That [Bleep] is going to jail, cause I'm pressing assault charges on her!!!!

Jenny: That's it!! We'll be back!!!!

Audience: Jenny! Jenny! Jenny! Jenny! Jenny! Jenny!

(Before the show fades, Ash puts the engagement ring on Duplica's finger and they make out some more. Misty is arrested and is dragged out of the studio. Delia is in tears because her son is getting married. The show fades out to show some extremely crappy commercials.)

In the next segment, James appears on the show and tells his long time friend, Jessie that he has a fetish for women's clothes. If you got anything feedback for me, e-mail me at... Hornet19us@Yahoo.com.

I'll be back soon!
2/14/2002