Disclaimer: FOR THE LAST FREAKIN' TIME, I DON'T OWN POKEMON!!!
Disturbing: Tread softly, Pokemon lovers. What lies before you is the script to the most shameless, senseless, and overall ridiculous Pokemon spoof ever written.  What you may read may shock you, disgust you, and alienate you from all that is Pokemon, BUT ENOUGH ABOUT THAT!!!

MegamanZero steps onto his podium. The crowd boos.

MegamanZero (ignoring the audience): Welcome ladies and germs! I stand before you to stand behind you to tell you something I know nothing about ... what a sec ... LINE!!!

Misty smacks MegamanZero on the head with her omnipresent mallet. The crowd cheers.

Misty: Line!? LINE!? What do you mean, LINE!? This is YOUR fanfic!!! Do you mean to tell me that you're just writing this on a whim!!?

MegamanZero (confused): You make it sound like it's a BAD thing.

Misty, along with the audience, anime falls.

Misty: That's it! I can't deal with this crap! I'm leaving!

Megaman Zero: HALT!!!

Everybody, including Misty, freezes. A sly grin appears on MegamanZero's face.

MegamanZero: It's my fanfic, RRRIIIGHT?

Misty: Ummmm ... yeah ...

MegamanZero: So ... in a way, that makes me kind of a GOD, right?

Misty (looking scared): Uhh ... yeah ... I guess so.

MegamanZero suddenly becomes larger in size and sprouts angel wings. A pitchfork appears in his hand and a bagpipe appears in the other. A pointed tail erupts from his backside and two horns stab outward from his forehead. His sly grin twists into a horrible grimace that would give Freddy Krueger nightmares.

MegamanZero (pointing a sausage-like finger at Misty): THEN IF THOU SHALT NOT OBEY THE GREAT ZERO HEAD, I SHALL TRANSFORM THEE INTO A GIANT RUBBER CHICKEN!
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

Misty: (cowering) Please, anything but that! Alright, I'll do your stupid fic!

The audience begin trampling each other trying to get to the exits. MegamanZero begins to emit loud, sour squawks from his bagpipe. Everybody screams out in pain at the horrible racket and covers their ears.

Misty: ARRRRGGHHHH! Whoever invented the bagpipe should've been shaved bald and dumped into the nearest manure wagon!

MegamanZero(stops playing that infernal instrument): No one's leaving. Not while I'm still Mayor of Cincinnati!

Misty(scratching her head): Huh?

MegamanZero(shrinking back to normal from that cosmic joke): Anywho, we've got to introduce the characters.

Someone in the Audience: YOU SUCK!!!!!

With a quick wave of his finger, MegamanZero turns that person into a pink pinniata. The audience screams "Hey, Pinniata!", blindfolds themselves, pull out baseball bats, and start beating the pinniata until candy spews forth. Then it becomes a total melee for the tasty treats.

MegamanZero: (bangs his gabble, which turns out to be an inflatable toy mallet) Order! ORDER!!!!

Audience stops, their faces stuffed full of candy (still in wrappers).

MegamanZero: Alright, then. Let's introduce ASH KETCHUM!

Ash walks from behind the curtain onto the stage. He waves at the audience meekly.

Ash: Um ... hi, everybody. As you all know, I'm Ash ...

Misty: WHOO, HOO! TAKE IT OFF, ASHY-BOY! HUBBA HUBBA! YOU SO FINE, YOU BLOW MY
MIND! (Throws a twenty at him.)

Audience sweatdrops.

Ash: (gulp) ... and I'm gonna be your main character in Not another Pokemon Spoof.

Misty: Come, baby, SHOW ME SOME SKIN!!! (Throws several more twenties at him, licks her lips.)  
   
MegamanZero: (sweatdrops) Uhhhh ... ANYWAY, let's hear a big round of applause for Ash Ketchum!

Audience claps like mad. Little hearts appear in Misty's eyes and she begins to scream "I LOVE YOU, I LOVE YOU!!" over and over again, kind of like the teeny-boppers do when the Backstreet Boys appear on stage. She's getting so wantonly worked up you'd swear that she's about to hump the podium.

MegamanZero: Geez, would somebody put a hose to Misty? Speaking of Misty, we have to introduce her as well!

Audience claps.

Misty: (whispers in Ash's ear) My trailer is the one that says "Misty" on it. (Giggle) I hope you won't disappoint me.

Ash: !

MegamanZero: Moving right along, we have here the most hated character in Pokemon. You know 'em, you despise 'em, you wish he was never made, give it up for Tracey Sketchit!!

Tracey moonwalks onto the stage. The audience boos and throws food at him.

Tracey: Look, the eggplants jumped over the ironing board! Birds!!

MegamanZero: Ummm ... oookaaaay. As you can see, folks, Tracey here never says anything of importance anyway, so I just have him in a state of constant, non-sensical jabbering.

Tracey: Do they serve broccili in Timbuktu? Happy to you, log pony!

MegamanZero: See what I mean?

Tracey: Why don't you just throw that curve-flapjack and send your cheese to my cigar factory before it eats up the marshmallow-covered platypus?

MegamanZero: Ok, shut up now, Trace.

Tracey: (saluting) Go to bed!

Tracey begins to do the Macarena while singing "I Want My Babyback Ribs".

MegamanZero: Well, then. Now that Tracey's out of the way (thank God), let's introduce you to the ultimate ladies-man wannabe! Put your hands together for Brock!!!!!!

Brock lowers down from the ceiling on a rope. He's wearing a black spandex outfit with giant letters spelling "THE BROCK" on the front and back. When he finally lowers to the floor a wrestling ring appears below him.

Brock: IF YA SMELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL WHAT THE BROCK IS COOKIN'!

MegamanZero: What an entrance folks, what an entrace ...

Brock: IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT YOU THINK! THE BROCK SAYS THAT IF YOU DO NOT FINISH WITH THIS STUPID PROLOGUE, THE BROCK WILL KICK YOUR ROOTY-POOT, CANDY-COATED, CANDY ASS!!!

MegamanZero: You see folks, I decided to spruce things up a bit by giving Brock what I call, Wrestling-Induced-Maniacal-Psychosis syndrome, or WIMP syndrome. Brock will be in a constant state of wrestling lines and boisterous, umm ... boastfullness.

Brock: AND THAT'S THE BOTTOM LINE, SO SUCK IT!!!

MegamanZero: Well, folks, enough with the introductions! Let's get this show on the road!

Crowd boos louder than ever before.

MegamanZero: And remember, there's a method to my cheesecake ... I mean madness.