Forlorn

Somewhere, I know, she is out there, living a whirlwind of happiness with someone else by her side. When I am in my loneliest state, as I am now, my feet automatically ascend the spiral staircase that twists and turns to my haven, the lighthouse balcony. It is my home even more so than the cottage by the sea that I bought with the profits from the Pokemon Storage System. So now I stand here, the light beam shining in the direction of the sea, the light wind of late November toying with my hair.

It’s impossible to describe how I feel about Lanette Roberts. We met one night several years ago at a computer convention and what attracted me to her was not her soft brown hair and eyes, but the degree of her intelligence. Naturally, she was quite humbled to meet me, I being the creator of the Storage System, and expressed her interest in creating a more advanced version for Hoenn. That simple conversation led to a dinner meeting in Goldenrod City, where we discussed the mechanisms of the System I had created specifically for Kanto. She was slowly developing the System and planned to stay in Johto so we could work side by side instead of via email correspondence. Naturally, by now, I was falling for her, with the speed and momentum of the fall increasing every day. I was overjoyed to have her in town, so I introduced her to my family. Harriet and Benjamin, my little brother and sister, were all over her as if she was a member of the family already, and I caught my parents casting knowing looks at one another several times during the course of the evening.

“You didn’t tell us you were bringing a girl home, William,” Father said in a low voice once Lanette was out of earshot. “Or was that whole big speech about never marrying and devoting your life to Pokemon just a ruse? You were only ten when you made that speech, after all.” He winked at me in that knowing way all parents have, but I only busied myself with my tie, trying not to sweat from nervousness.

“Oh, Father, don’t be silly,” I responded with a shaky laugh. “We’re just friends and colleagues; it will go no further than that.”

Father looked past me to the trim, pale form of Lanette waiting on the doorstep and smiled. “You may say that now, William, but your feelings will change, trust me. I went through the same feelings when I met your mother, and look at us now: we have a wonderful life and three beautiful children. You could be like that one day.”

“Children and marriage never did suit well with me,” I replied. “If you’ll excuse me, I think I’ll escort Lanette back to her hotel.”

“It will change, my boy, your feelings will change,” Father said simply in parting as he softly shut the door on the two of us. Lanette turned to face me, light from a nearby streetlamp only revealing the shadowed profile of her face.

“What was that all about?” she asked as we walked through the bustling metropolis of a city. “Your dad was being very secretive about what he was talking about with you.”

“Oh, it was nothing worth repeating, I assure you,” I answered. “You know how fathers can be, always jumping to conclusions about things that aren’t true.” I took a quick glance to study her expression as we neared the hotel lobby entrance and realized that she was staring at her shoes.

“My father was always very strict when I was young from what I can remember.” She spoke in a soft voice with a tinge of sadness in her tone. “He believed that humans and Pokemon were not meant to coexist as friends, so I wasn’t allowed to attend the Pokemon Trainer’s School in Rustboro City. We lived in Sootopolis and were isolated from the rest of Hoenn as it was. Mom managed to talk him out of it, but he only allowed me to continue my education at home, and I was barred from studying Pokemon. That was one of my fondest memories as a child, working out mathematics with Mom in the warm kitchen and studying computer textbooks. They were fairly new back then, don’t you remember?” She turned to me, her brown eyes probing mine, a faint smile on her lips. God, do I love her smile…

I shivered a bit at the thought. You will forever be single, Bill Maxwell, I reminded myself sternly in my mind. There is absolutely no point in thinking about illogical things like…well, love at a time like this. “Yeah, I used to love building computers for people here in Goldenrod. They called me a prodigy, but I was always humble when it came to all the recognition,” I answered. “Now that I think about it, I still am.”

“Mom’s friends all called me a child genius because of my ability to solve algebra problems at will,” Lanette answered as we finally stepped inside the lobby and took a seat on a forest green velour couch, an awkward silence suddenly hanging over our heads. My eyes strayed over to the elevator at the far end of the first floor and I met Lanette’s gaze again.

“So…shall we go upstairs?” I asked with an air of a schoolboy who had absolutely nothing to talk about.

Lanette’s gaze was distant, and then she let loose a giggle. “I’m tired of formalities, Bill, let’s be children again, just for tonight and then we’ll return to our philosophical discussions tomorrow. Is that good enough for you?”

“Yes,” I answered promptly. “There’s just one thing I want to say.”

Lanette turned to me with innocent curiosity, but she couldn’t hide the teasing in her voice. “What?”

“I would be happy to escort a fair lady such as yourself to her room…if the maiden in question can catch me first!” I tore off into the lobby, Lanette laughing like I had never heard before. We must have looked like a sight to the hotel management, two of the most esteemed people in the Pokemon scientific community running up and down the halls of the formal hotel like two wild little children, the children we never had the chance to be. Mentally, that was what we were at the time, and when I look back on it, it was the most fun night I had ever had.

“You’re getting warm!” I would say, egging her on to keep her going, but then pulling ahead at the last minute, my black calf-leather boots pounding into the carpet. We startled housemaids every so often, causing us to laugh even harder as they exchanged looks.

“Bill, you cad!” Lanette said with breathless laughter as we finally reached the door of her room. She had her hand on my velvet coat and was just beginning to catch her breath after the chase and our shared laughter. “That,” she said with satisfaction, “is the essence of being a child. Thank you so much; I not only got a workout, but I caught you at the same time.”

I turned and looked into her shining eyes with a smirk. “No, Lanette…I think we both caught each other.” I couldn’t hide it; the sly, teasing part of me was coursing through my veins. She smiled as well, playing along even though we both knew what was to come next.

“It all depends on your definition of catch, Mr. Child Prodigy,” she answered as I felt her slip into my arms. Surprisingly, I did enjoy the idea of holding her close to me more than I thought I would…

Remember when I told Father that love and marriage didn’t suit me? I broke that vow the minute I leaned forward and let Lanette’s lips brush mine, feeling more happier than I ever had been in my life. It was passionate, it was innocent, it was a breath of fresh, beautiful wind. I felt her body begin to twirl in my arms and we danced like we had never done before. Although I’m sure people stopped and gawked at us, I didn’t care. One thing would be fresh in my mind when we pulled apart, if we ever allowed each other to let go: I was in love and it was wonderful.

All that obscured my vision were whirling, yellow lights and Lanette’s soft brown hair.

***

We kept in touch via email after Lanette returned to Hoenn and I went to Kanto; she would email me of the events in her life and her progress on the Storage System. By daylight, I would pace around the cottage wondering when she would drop in for a visit, and by night I would relive that glorious night in Goldenrod repeatedly. As much as I was unsure about marriage and all it held for couples, Lanette Maxwell had a nice ring to it…

Then one day, a week ago, I believe, she finally showed up at my door. Her cheeks were rosy from the late November chill that was befalling the region, but she was positively glowing with warmth as I embraced her again.

“Oh, Bill, Bill, Bill,” she whispered into my neck just after I had managed to shut the door so that prying eyes couldn’t see what was going on between us. “I did it! After all these years of trial and error, I did it! I finished the Storage System! Emailing you wouldn’t have the same affect that telling you in person would, so here I am!”

“Congratulations, yours most likely surpasses mine by leaps and bounds,” I said laughingly as we pulled apart, and it was then that I became aware of how much colder the room was when we weren’t holding each other close.

“Don’t be silly, Bill,” she scolded playfully. “All I did was model mine after yours and adjust it; I have no need of praise.” I responded by kissing her on the cheek, causing her red cheeks to darken to crimson.

“Do you have need of tea?” I asked teasingly as I sauntered into the kitchen to put the single copper kettle I owned to work.

Fifteen minutes later we sat together on the couch, steaming cups of tea in our hands as we stared into the roaring embers of the fireplace. Lanette was snuggled next to me, but not so much that it felt cloying. She sipped her tea and faced me, her expression the same as it had been on that fateful night several years ago. “Bill?” she asked softly.

“Hmmm?” I asked, weaving my fingers through hers.

“Did I ever tell you about Celio, my childhood friend from Sootopolis?”
“No, but I have noticed he’s been in the Cerulean Herald lately because he’s trying to develop a Pokemon Network System, whatever that is,” I answered in an uninterested voice. “Why do you ask?”

Her tone wasn’t light or teasing now, but grave and serious. “I didn’t come here just to tell you that I finished the Storage System, Bill. Celio needs a bigger area to conduct his experiments, so he’s moving to One Island and I offered to help him move in. I’ll be gone for at least two weeks, but I’ll email you often. I promise.”

A curious feeling was taking over my soul as she spoke those words; was it jealously at the thought of Celio and Lanette alone together for two weeks that bothered me so much? “I look forward to them, Lanette, you’ve brought life back into this cottage again. Enjoy the surf while you’re there.”

“I most certainly will,” she said with a shadow of the smile I adored. “Oh, yes, I almost forgot, I’ve got something for you.” I watched her slender hands dig into her pocket until she drew out a Pokeball. “I hope this Eevee I caught will bring as much life as I have to this cottage, Bill. When you see him, think of me and know that I love you.”

“That is a definite promise,” I answered as I gave Lanette a quick hug. She set her teacup down on the coffee table at our feet, pulled on her faux fur coat and stepped out, shutting the door behind her. My gaze never left the door after she left, somehow dreaming that she would turn around and stay a little while longer. If only Celio didn’t have to steal her away so soon…

“I love you more than you realize, Lanette,” I whispered softly as I turned my mind to other matters. The Pokeball with the Eevee inside was still sitting in my palm, so I figured that now would be as good a time as ever to introduce myself. “Come on out, Eevee.” I let the Pokeball drop to the floor, and Eevee appeared soon after.

“Vee!” it greeted me in a cheerfulness that echoed Lanette’s personality. I bent down and scratched her behind the ears; she nuzzled my hand in return.

It was the start of something beautiful.

***

A blast of wind quickly draws me back into the present; I’m standing next to the lighthouse railing, my eyes on the foggy sea. Somewhere far out beyond the horizon, I know she is on One Island with Celio, but the hope that she will visit me when she returns sustains me every time I think of it. I stretch my hand out to the dense fog and try to catch it with my bare hands, but I know it a fruitless attempt; trying to touch the fog makes me feel closer to Lanette even though we are miles apart.

“Vee?” Eevee’s soft, questioning tone causes me to turn around and face the light flooding outside from the lighthouse tower door. I smile at her, encouraging her to join me on the balcony. She leaps into my arms and we stare out at the horizon, pondering the mysteries of the sea in companionable silence. I have learned in various studies while dressing up as Pokemon that it is in the most peaceful of times when both Pokemon and trainer meld as one. My observation is true in this moment in suspended time, the twinkling stars and sea in between Eevee and I.

“Come on,” I tell Eevee finally, breaking the midnight tranquility. “Let’s go and email Lanette, I’m sure she’d be glad to hear from us. I follow Eevee to the lighthouse door, but before I start down the spiral stairs and back to Cerulean City, I pause again. We are closing the door on the night, and I don’t feel so forlorn anymore.