Title: The Three Little Trainers and Yellow-locks
Author: Shadow/Phantomness
Pairing: Championshipping (Lance/Red), AAMRN (Ash/Misty), Ambershipping (Gold/Yellow)
Fandom: Pokémon
Theme: #33, Cookie

Rating: PG
Disclaimer: Pokemon belongs to Nintendo and Shogakukan Comics. This non-profit, non-copyright infringing fanfiction belongs to me under international copyright laws and taking it is plagiarism. Thank you. *Phantomness bows*

Notes: <> for telepathy, ** for thoughts, italics if a pokemon talks

Warnings: AU, het, Crack fairytale, Yellow-bashing

 

            Once upon a time, in a small red roofed house in Pallet Town, lived three Pokemon Trainers. One day, Red, Ash, and Gold all went for a walk, because they liked staying in shape and besides, they had to wait for the cookies that they had baked to cool so they could eat them.

            While they were gone, a snotty little girl named Yellow-locks arrived at the house. Seeing that there was no one home, she went inside. There, she saw three plates of cookies cooling on the table. She tasted the first plate, but they were too salty. She tasted the second plate, but they were too sweet. Finally, she tasted the last plate of cookies, and they were just right, so she ate them all up, leaving a puddle of drool on the plate in the process.

            Yellow-locks proceeded into the next room, where she saw three chairs. The first chair was upholstered in red fabric with gold fringes, but when she sat on it, it was too hard. The second chair was a squashy beanbag that was sea green colored, but it was so soft that she sank into it. The last chair was made of plain wood with a blue cushion and it was just right, so she rocked back and forth on it until it broke.

            Feeling tired now, Yellow-locks went into the last room. There she saw three beds. When she climbed in the first one, she saw a red-haired boy who pulled out a knife. She scrambled out of the bed. When she climbed in the second one, she saw a red-haired girl wielding a mallet. When she climbed into the last bed, no one pushed her out of bed, so she fell fast asleep.

 

            During this time, the three trainers had decided to return home. They had fought off several Rattata and feeling energized, were ready to eat their cookies.

            However, when they got home, they found the door open!

            “… Someone’s been eating my cookies.” Red remarked eying the remnants of what had once been a stack of chocolate pecan chip cookies.

            “Someone’s been eating my cookies too.” Ash said, frowning at the remains of his chocolate chip cookies.

            “Eew,” Gold said. “I can’t believe people actually ate your cookies, what with what you’ve been putting in them.”

            Red just smirked while Ash blushed.

            “Hey! Someone’s been eating my cookies too! They’re all gone!” Gold wailed. His mint chip cookies were completely missing. “And there’s drool all over this plate! Gross!”

            … The two other Trainers looked nervous, and reached for their Poke Balls.

 

            They walked into the living room. Red was gratified to note that the thief had not thought to steal their television or trophies, but…

            “Someone’s been sitting in my chair.” She remarked, before brushing cookie crumbs off the red velvet in disdain.

            “Someone’s been sitting in my chair.” Ash echoed, trying to plump his beanbag chair back up.

            “… My chair is a wreck, so I think someone’s been sitting in it.” Gold said angrily. That chair had been a one-of-a-kind Mystery Gift present!

            Now getting quite angry, Gold released his Quilava. Red released her Espeon, and Ash his Pikachu.

            They crept upstairs to the bedroom, and there, surveyed their beds.

 

            “Well, someone’s been in my bed.” Red said. She climbed under the covers as Lance snuggled up to him. He petted the Dragon Master’s red hair, smiling.

            “Shh… it’s all right now…”

            “Mine.” Lance said, before pinning Red beneath him in a kiss. Gold rolled his eyes, wishing he didn’t have to share a room with his sister.

            “Yes, yours,” She grinned.

 

            “Someone’s been trying to sleep in my bed too.” Ash concluded. “Misty, are you all right?”

            The other Trainer gave him a teary smile, and nodded.

            “No one tried to molest you?”

            Misty shook her head.

            “Oh good…”

 

            “Guys, there’s a stranger in my bed!” Gold yelped.

            All of the people in the room sat up. Espeon, Pikachu, and Quilava attacked the bed as one. Yellow-locks woke up with a scream.

            Lance bared his fangs, as Red hugged him, and Misty summoned another mallet while Ash looked worried.

            Gold was about to kick Yellow-locks out, when he realized that despite her ugly looks, she was female, and he hadn’t gotten laid in a while.

            Maybe this was for the best.

            From then on, no one ever saw Yellow-locks leave the house.

 

End Fic

Completed 7/21/07

Edited 11/13/09

I feel oddly hyper. Must be sleep deprivation. *Cough*

14 minutes! Whew…