Title: Penguins
Author: Shadow/Phantomness
Pairing: Championshipping (Lance x Red)
Fandom: Pokémon
Theme: #39, Black and White
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: Pokemon belongs to Nintendo and Shogakukan Comics. This non-profit, non-copyright infringing fanfiction belongs to me under international copyright laws and taking it is plagiarism. Thank you. *Phantomness bows*

Notes: <> for telepathy, ** for thoughts, italics if a pokemon talks

Warnings: AU, het

“I look like a penguin!” Red protested, as he emerged from his bedroom in a tuxedo. He didn’t like tuxedos!

Lance raised her eyebrows, not bothering to comment.

“I think the suit looks very nice on you,” Lorelei demurred.

Red flapped his arms and made quacking noises, as Bruno laughed. Formal wear was such a pain.

“It’s not fair! Why do I have to wear this?”

“Because your normal attire is much too informal, Red,” The redhead shrugged. “I think it’s cute.”

“C-Cute,” He blushed. She shouldn’t say these things!

“Oh, quit teasing him. He’s so … gullible.” Lorelei substituted, seeing the teen’s angry glare.

Bruno stifled a yawn. “Well, I’ve got to get into my penguin suit as well, if that’s any comfort to you, Red.”

The idea of Bruno wearing a suit was sufficiently odd to cheer Red up, and he grinned. Misery loved company after all.

Besides, the girls all had to wear dresses, so that helped a little.

Sure enough, Bruno did wear a suit to the dinner last night. It was not black and white though – it was a hideous shade of maroon. Red had to bite his lip to keep from laughing when Bruno sat down two seats down. Every eye in the hall turned to stare, though no one would admit it.

Lance smiled.

The food was delicious, and afterwards, the men and women got up to dance as a light waltz played. Of course, everyone knew that this event was more of a ‘seen and be seen’ walk, then a social for the benefit of AIDS victims, but no one commented on it.

It would be quite improper to do so, after all.

Society was so shallow. Red sighed as he stirred his drink with the straw, eying it dubiously. Was it alcoholic or not?

Lance snatched the cocktail glass from him, took a sip, and casually dumped it into a potted plant lining the wall. Red winced.

“It was poisoned?” He whispered.

“Quite,” She replied.

“I should have known…”

“It’s all right.” Lance glanced around the room for a moment, and then slipped an Antidote into Red’s hand. Red swiftly injected himself, watching as the syringe vaporized into particles. He wondered what kind of technology Silph used to pull that off.

“Champion…”

“Hmm,” Red asked sleepily. Lance was shaking him, with a worried expression on her face.

“… I’m taking you home now.” The Dragon Master said, before she jumped. Red eeped as they went flying through the air. Several blow darts thudded onto the tiles where they had previously been standing.

Lance snarled, and Red caught a glimpse of metal before a hail of needles went sailing through the air. A masked man with a blowgun in hand tumbled down from one of the upper windows.

People screamed, and she smirked. “Found you…”

The man twitched, but she was undaunted, the very picture of an avenging angel. “That’s Beedrill venom on those needles. You’ll not live more than a few minutes. You may come clean if you wish, or if you don’t wish, Agatha will … persuade you to part with the information later.”

The assassin spat at her.

Red clutched at Lance’s sleeve, as his eyes misted over. “Lance, I…”

“I know.” She said, and collected the black-haired teen just before he fainted. Agatha shrugged, watching as their Leader released Dragonite and the two of them took off, Red safely in Lance’s arms.

Children! They really were so obvious.

When Red woke up again, Lance was busy making tea. He blinked, recognizing his location as her bedroom, and sighed.

“You’re awake.” She said sounding quite relieved.

“What happened? Who shot me?” Red tried to get up, but she hastily pushed him back down.

“I don’t know. I’m not quite sure it was just you. A lot of the other Gym Leaders are home sick today. It seems someone was using poison gas.”

“They must be really determined to kill me then.” He sighed. “But I don’t know why. I haven’t done anything!”

“I do not know.” She said. “But until we find the culprits, you are not going to any formal events.”

Red grinned. “Ah, well, that’s a small price to pay for safety – and it’s a price I’d gladly pay!”

“Mm,” The Dragon Master said. “Feeling better now?”

“Kiss me and make me better?” He prompted, teasing his girlfriend.

Lance shrugged, and obeyed.

End Fic

Completed 8/23/06

Edited 8/27/09

Assassination attempts, whee!

Why can’t I just stick to writing drabbles? Beats me