Yay, another chapter!

Disclaimer: Pokemon belongs to Nintendo and Shogakukan Comics. This lovely fanfiction belongs to me. Do not dare steal my work!

Notes: <> for telepathy, ** for thoughts, italics for letters and pokemon talking

Chapter 7

 

June 13, 2047

Father, I’m tired. I can’t hold the world together anymore. I feel like I’m going to shatter any instant – am I a coward if I’m afraid?

I can’t stop the snowball and yet I can’t just wait and do nothing either!

Father, help me…

 

            Ash swallowed. This was the last of the entries. No, it wasn’t… he checked again. There were two more.

            He had learned a lot about Lance in the last three months, also a lot about the Pokemon League system – Lance’s journal entries were really accurate and helpful! Plus, it kept the congressmen guessing how he knew all that he knew…

            Well, on to the next entry. He took a sip from his glass of lemonade and clicked the next date.

 

June 18, 2047

It hurts.

It’s trying to get out.

It wants to get away.

Father, help me!

I can’t hold it in any longer – the fire! The fire will come for me and burn the ice into nothing and there will be nothing left!

Help… me…

 

            Okay. Now he was scared. He remembered how Lance had died – how could he not, people normally don’t burn to death on television…

            But… the last entry wasn’t quite what he expected. It was written – Ash gulped here, it was written about half an hour before Lance’s death.

            Had he known he was going to die?

 

July 1, 2047.

It’s time.

I can’t hold it in any longer. I’m unworthy – I can feel the world burning, burning, and my blood is too thin… my blood is… tainted, dirty…

Help me… Father, I tried, I’m sorry, I tried my best, I wish I … I wish I were stronger!

I wish I could have told him how I felt.

I wish I could have loved him this life.

Am I selfish for thinking that?

I’ve tried to be kind, and I know I’m doing my duty, but it’s so hard, and it hurts, and I burn and I melt and I want to die but!

Oh father…

Will it hurt?

It probably will – not as much as the Sword, but it will hurt… still, a guardian’s work is never done, and it’s time to pay the price.

I wish I could save the world. I wish I could save the world, for his sake and for the world’s sake. For all the pokémon that live here…

But I can’t.

I’m too weak.

Forgive me…

I never… he’ll never know how I feel…

It hurts so much, but soon, so soon, all the pain will be gone, right?

I… love you…A…

 

            The entry stopped there. Ash assumed Lance had gone on T.V. with the other Elites then. He shuddered.

            How… what had Lance died for? The pokemon? The world? Were they just insane ramblings? No, he was fairly sure Lance was sane, if a bit evasive, even in his own diary, but… why did Lance have to die?

            It made no sense?

            And whom did he love – er, whom had he loved? Sabrina? Erika? Lorelei? Clair? No, he had read about all four girls and Lance had only treated them like friends or family… and he didn’t think Lance liked Bruno, certainly not Brock!

            A… were there people named ‘A’? He had to say no to that.

            Ash was surprised to see that it was four A.M. already. Blushing, he quickly closed the computer and went to bed.

            He’d do some more research tomorrow… maybe check the registered trainer listing or something…

 

            The next morning, he ran a search. Several names came up – Amanda Brown, the girl he had fought. Earth Badge level.

            Alice Chang – Cascade level.

            Ashley Charles – Soul level.

            Ace Farmer – Boulder level.

            Amber Jade – Cascade level.

            Aaron Kit – Fog level. Fog? Must be from Johto…

            His own name – Ash Ketchum, Elite level.

            Amber Mock – Zephyr Level. Another Johto badge…

            Adrian Wong – Volcano level.

            Ashley Witherspoon – Balance level. Johto maybe?

            Ai-Chang Yu – Rainbow level.

 

            Well, that was that!

            It was not really worth digging farther, was it? Ash knew he shouldn’t, but his curiosity just wouldn’t give up…

            Who had Lance loved?

            He didn’t even realize that he was rather… obsessed with the idea now.

           

            “I love you…”

            Ash’s head snapped up. “What?”

            He thought that he heard something…. No, he was just overreacting, wasn’t he? He stared back at the computer, rubbing his eyes.

            Had he accidentally clicked on another date? It was a different entry he had already read. Shrugging, he reread it. Perhaps he’d gain some insight this way…

 

March 4, 2047

Father says that if you love someone, you’re willing to die for him or her… I suppose that makes sense, but right now, it’s just not right.

If I die, who will mourn? Father will, I know, because he loves me… my mother? Hah, she’s too busy spreading her legs for more customers – I’ve heard that I have another sister somewhere, another half. Figures. And she’s too righteous to get an abortion and not enough to quit her job.

Well, I know Clair cares, and Lorelei, and Agatha, but… that’s all. And… no, I can’t say his name. I will never, ever say his name…

Because that would show that I’m losing faith, and I can’t have that.

I have to be strong.

There was another Council meeting today. They decided to cut funding to Vermillion Oil and Gas. Thank Lugia for that!

Well, not really, but I know Father will be happy…

That should help the poor Tentacool live peacefully from now on. No more boatloads of sludge dumped in the harbor in the dead of night, no more scurrying and hiding and stinging to keep people away….

I wish I could help more, but I’m doing what I can. Perhaps in a few years it will be completely gone…

But then again, my predictions are almost always correct.

I’ll believe.

 

            Ash drank down half his glass of Fresh Water and blinked.

            … Him?

            Well, that eliminated a few of the names on the list. So what if Lance had been gay? It meant nothing.

            Ace Farmer had only become a trainer two weeks ago. It probably wasn’t him, unless… well, Ace’s hometown was listed as Viridian.

            Where had Lance lived?

            He knew Clair ran the Blackthorn Gym in Johto, and if Lance were her cousin… but Lorelei was Lance’s cousin as well, and she lived… somewhere.

            Hmm…

            Wait! Then again, if his mother was from Cerulean… did he live there? Er, had he lived there?

            And the last sister mentioned. Could that be Misty?

            How scary… well, Lance had blonde hair and blue eyes and maybe he looked a tiny bit like Daisy, but Misty? No way.

            Lance’s Father… was still alive, right?

            Maybe he could ask him…

 

            He brought up the Internet browser and ran a search for Lance. He found several obituaries in different newspapers, and … aha!

            Lance was still listed in the Trainer database, except now there was a (D) for deceased next to it.

            Ash clicked on the Champion’s picture and was taken to another page.

            Hometown: N/A (Suspected to be Blackthorn City)

            Residence: Indigo Plateau

            Age: 18 (Deceased)

            Pokemon Level: Elite Level – Kanto Champion

            Pokemon Team: Dragonite, 2 Dragonair, Aerodactyl, and Gyarados

            Other Pokemon (Kept in Blackthorn City): Kingdra, Ampharos, Charizard, Tyranitar… others unknown.

            Relatives: Father – unknown. Mother – Rose Waterflower. Sisters – Daisy, Violet, Lily, and Misty Waterflower

           

            Ash gulped. So Lance was related to Misty! He kept reading.

 

            Cousins – Clair Dragyn, Lorelei Winters, Charlotte Starr

 

            Charlotte? Never heard of her. Lance had never mentioned her in his diary. Probably wasn’t important.

            There wasn’t any more data, except for a badge listing – Lance had gotten all sixteen badges from Kanto and Johto, plus four from the Orange Islands, but hadn’t tried the new Houen league yet.

            Well… so his father… who was Lance’s father anyway?

            Ash shrugged.  He was thinking too much. He closed the browser and tried to put Lance out of his mind, reminding himself that tomorrow he had another league function to attend. It worked. He collected his pokemon and then went for a run in the forest with them…

           

End Chapter

Completed 6/14/05

Lance: So, now what?
Phantomness: *Shrug*

Shoyko: You don’t know?! Oh please don’t let it be more darkfic…

Kairo: Don’t worry… Phantomness is in a slightly better mood I think.

Pika-chan: We all hope so

Ash: *Nods*!