You are not supposed to like Queen Phoebe. I just thought I would make that point clear…

Disclaimer: Pokemon belongs to Nintendo and Shogakukan Comics. This non-profit, non-copyright infringing fanfiction belongs to me under international copyright laws and taking it is plagiarism. Thank you. *Phantomness bows*

Notes: <> for telepathy, ** for thoughts, italics if a pokemon talks

Chapter 5

This was insane! He was never going to get through the game at this rate. At least he knew what the ring did now…

Red yawned as he rode along with Sir Sidney, wondering for the umpteenth time what would happen if he just gave the ring to Queen Phoebe and told her to let him be King. That might work, right?

As he walked in, sure enough, Queen Phoebe noticed the ring and asked to see it. Red slid it off his finger, and as Queen Phoebe put it on to admire it, her eyes glazed.

Bruno, surprisingly, was the first to notice the change in his mother, but thought little of it.

Drake ignored her, as he was itching to leave the castle and go back to his sailing life on the high seas.

Lance raised his eyebrows, but did not comment.

Red started to feel quite uncomfortable as the Queen Mother simpered and giggled at him, but he bore it quite manfully, and she was more than happy to give him the crown.

It was only when the crown touched his head that he realized something was wrong.

“Oh no! My love!” Queen Phoebe cried in despair as she realized that she had just given him the wrong crown.

Red, who was currently a solid gold statue, did not answer. It was a pity that love tended to make people careless, for Queen Phoebe had just placed the Midas Crown on Red’s head.

It was a wonderful artifact that could turn one object, animate or inanimate, into pure gold. It could be used exactly once by every member of royal blood.

Queen Phoebe had just used her turn.

Red woke up on the grassy hill, and wondered whether it was worth it to get the crown or not. He must be doing something wrong, but what? He had gotten the ring, hadn’t he? So what else did he need to do?

He sighed.

So next time, when he went to the castle, Red decided not to give the ring to anyone. He had no interest in Drake or Bruno, and Queen Phoebe might turn him into a gold statue again! If only there was a way to get them to like him without resorting to magical means…

That felt rather like cheating.

But at this rate, he had not even survived a day, and the game was supposed to take place over the course of a month! Perhaps he ought to come back and try it later, with a clearer head?

Red exited the machine. Lorelei glanced up as he passed.

“You still have three lives worth.”

“I know, but I need a break.”

“I see.” Lorelei gave him a sympathetic smile. “Hard game…”

“Have you played it before?”

“Yes, but don’t expect me to tell you how to win.”

“I thought so.”

“It’s different for every player, and for boys and girls.” She went on. “I can give you a hint though. Did you get the ring from your father?”

Red nodded.

“Did he tell you what it did?”

Red shook his head.

Lorelei frowned. “That’s a problem… may I see you pokédex please?”

Red obligingly handed it over, as Lorelei ran it through her scanner. She frowned at the few of the entries, before she handed it back.

“The power of the ring is variable, but it is heavily influenced by your starting pokémon partner.”

“My Poliwhirl?”

“Yes. My starter was Seel, so for me, the ring gave me the power to freeze subjects for a few moments.”

“I see…”

“But for you, I’m not sure. Whatever it is, it’s definitely not supposed to be a love spell!”

Red flushed. “I thought so, but I wanted to make sure.”

Lorelei continued to type on her keyboard for a few minutes, before she handed him his pokédex back. “You captured all of the legendaries? Every single one?”

“No. I missed Mew, Serebii, and Jirachi.”

“Hmm…” Lorelei frowned. “That’s odd then. There seems to be… it almost seems as though the game program itself has been corrupted.”

Red gulped. “Did I do something wrong?”

She waved him off. “Nothing like that, but I’ll have to run a scan to make sure. Would you mind not playing that game again until tomorrow, or the day after?”

“All right.”

“I’m very sorry for the inconvenience. Would you like to try one of the other games while we run a diagnostic scan?”

“No, it’s all right.” Red stifled a yawn. “I’m a little bit tired anyway. I’ll come back tomorrow.”

“Wait a minute.” Lorelei dug around in her desk for a moment, coming up with a roll of tokens. “Your refund.”

Red thanked her and left the Gaming Center, feeling strangely unsatisfied.

At home, he plugged into his own system, where his copy of Fire Red was kept. He enjoyed this game, and so he had bought the setup for an exorbitant fee.

Poliwhirl hugged him, and Pika licked his cheek, and he went flying on Aeroy for a while until the cool air helped him damp.

Could he actually be missing the game already? That was ridiculous! But… but…

But Lance had been nice, that one time, and even if it wasn’t really reality, the sex had been good too.

Red sighed. What a time for his hormones to make their presence known… besides, it was just a game!

End Chapter

Completed 8/17/06

Poor conflicted Red *Snickers*

Red: *Blush*

Phantomness: *Cackles*

Lance: *Grins*