Poem fic?

Disclaimer: Pokemon belongs to Nintendo and Shogakukan Comics. This non-profit, non-copyright-infringing fanfic belongs to me.

Notes: <> for telepathy, ** for thoughts, italics if a pokemon talks

The Song belongs to Saliva, a band, and not to me. There. I’ve said it! I’m not using the whole song though, just bits and pieces, most likely in incorrect order… Ehehehe… enjoy!

Um… Timeline. I have no idea. T-W-T, because this is AU! Ash is 15 and Lance is 18 in case anyone was interested…

Warnings: Angst, implied championshipping and Palletshipping

Title: Llorar

Oh I know that he’s your soulmate,

That you were meant to be together,

But then we shared our first kiss,

And now he’s mine forever.

So I want to say I’m sorry,

But there’s nothing I can do,

I just hope that Cupid’s arrow,

Finds someone else for you.

Gary (and Ash)

Lance calmly crumpled up the sheet of binder paper the poem had been written on and tossed it into the wastebasket. Turning to the Pikachu waiting outside, he fixed it with a glare. “Leave. Now. You’ve delivered your message, haven’t you?”

Pikachu squeaked and put her hands on her hips. You’re being mean!

“Why am I being mean? Oh, I’m sure this works out well enough for him. A poem will fix anything, won’t it?” Lance asked sarcastically. “He wasn’t man enough to tell me face to face, was he?”

Ash isn’t that way!

“Excuse me, but why couldn’t he _tell_ me?” Lance asked. “Surely he could have at least spared a few moments. Or is his schedule so busy he has no time even for that? Wait, I forgot. His new boyfriend is _quite_ possessive.”

Pikachu’s cheeks sparked as she attempted to fry Lance.

Lance’s gold eyes blazed angrily as a clear shield surrounded him. “Out. Now.” The lightning reflected off, frying Pikachu in return.

Casting one last huffy look, the mouse scampered.

The Champion got up, poured himself a glass of some unidentifiable, possibly alcoholic beverage, as he folded himself back into his throne and closed his eyes.

When had their love gone so… wrong?

**********************(Insert song lyrics)*****************************

I hear... a voice say, "Don't be so blind"...
it's telling me all these things...
that you would probably hide...
am I... your one and only desire...
am I the reason you breathe...
or am I the reason you cry...

******************************************************************

I thought you were my soulmate,

We promised love forever…

Or was I only one more toy,

For you to put together…

I’m asking – where did I fail?

Please tell me where I fell,

Was it that night in Cinnabar?

When you first saw me kill?

Lance

Ash was shaking as he finished reading the email.

“What’s wrong, Ash?” Gary asked, concern in his eyes. “Spam email? Death threats? Annoying legislation? Or…”

“Not now, Gary.” Ash said. “I think I need some time alone…”

Gary frowned. They’d only been together for about two weeks, but he knew they were meant to be. “Is it Lance?”

“H-hai…”

“Sheesh, Ash. Do you love me or not?”

“It’s not a matter of that! I’m trying to figure something important out.” Ash snapped back.

This caught Gary off guard. Usually Ash was gentle and calm, but now…

“All right. Take some time alone. But if I find you cheating on me…”

“I won’t.” Ash said shortly. * Why would I? Didn’t I choose you over Lance? Why would I go back on that? *

He found a flat rock, sat down, and tried to think.

Cinnabar. Two years ago. It wasn’t really that long ago. He had been there, challenging Blaine, which was nothing special. Lance had been there, cheering him on, albeit in disguise, because the Champion isn’t _supposed_ to leave the Plateau. No, it wasn’t that. Lance had saved his life back then. Team Rocket agent had come out with two guns blazing, Lance had pulled an array of silver daggers out of his cloak and thrown them, the rocket had gone down bleeding from several puncture wounds, but he was safe. From the news, the Rocket had died a few days later.

But if it wasn’t Cinnabar…

Exactly what had caused their break up? He wasn’t quite sure himself.

Was it drifting? Was it distance? Was it because a childhood romance couldn’t last the barriers of training and adulthood?

They had been friends as kids, yes, he remembered that… but when he was eight, Lance had moved away… and he’d become friends with Gary…

Was that the cause?

Ash opened his pokedex and began composing an email back to Lance. How could he explain?

***********************Insert Song Lyrics******************************

I feel... like you don't want me around...
I guess i'll pack all my things...
I guess i'll see you around...
It's all... been bottled up until now...
as I walk out your door...
all I can hear is the sound...

********************************************************************

Lance, please don’t think I hate you,

I promise from my heart,

I know that this is painful,

We’re being torn apart.

But you see, it couldn’t work out,

We were just children then,

And now I’m finally grown up,

I’m leaving you again…

Ash

P.S. No, I’m not mad over Cinnabar… I just don’t think it would have worked out. I’m not sure I love you.

“Lance. This is insane. You can’t just leave! The League is in two months!” Lorelei snapped.

“I need some time alone to think.” Lance said, busy throwing garments and pokemon items into his backpack. Funny, he hadn’t used it in so long…

“You need some time alone to think.” Lorelei raised her eyebrows.

Lance nodded.

“Promise me you won’t run away?”

His breath caught in his throat – how could she have known – guessed? Still, honor was one thing.

Loyalty was another.

Twins they could be at times, and now they were binding him. He had to stay for the League, for…

“I promise.”

Lorelei frowned as Lance walked outside into the sunshine. She still couldn’t shake the nagging feeling that he might be leaving for good.

No, that was just fanciful superstition. He had promised, right?

*********************Insert Song Lyrics********************************

I see... the blood all over your hands...
does it make you feel... more like a man...
was it all... just a part of your plan...
this pistol's shakin' in my hands...
and all I hear is the sound...

*******************************************************************

So you think my love is false, Ash?

You’d better think again.

I’ll do one thing to prove it,

You’ll never doubt again.

Don’t worry about repercussions,

I’ve already sealed the deal,

And when this deed is finished,

Feel free to blaze your own trail.

Lance. ^-^

P.S. No? I thought you would be. Never mind then. I can safely assure you that I love you and not puppy love, but don’t mind me.

Ash looked at the email response he had gotten sideways. This did not sound… Lance-ish. No. Something was wrong. Maybe it was just the smiley face icon?

“I’d better call to make sure…”

Picking up the phone, Ash dialed the Blackthorn City gym.

“Blackthorn City Gym, Claire speaking, who is it?”

“Claire, is Lance staying with you right now?”

“No, why would he? Has something happened to my cousin?” An irate gym leader demanded.

“I don’t think so…”

“What do you mean you don’t think so? I thought – oh! Did you two break up?”

“H-hai…”

“Haven’t heard from him for a few days. He should still be at the Plateau there. Try calling them.”

“Right, thanks Claire!”

“No problem.” A pause. “Oh, and if you did anything to hurt Lance, I’ll tear your throat out. That’s a promise, Ash!”

Ash paled and nodded, hanging up.

Gary came back from getting water. “Ash? You done ‘thinking’ yet?”
“Almost.” Ash nodded. “Just a couple more minutes.”

“Good.”

“Indigo Plateau, Lorelei speaking. This had better not be a prank call, or I swear to Ho-oh I will find you and revoke your license.”

“Um… hi? Can I talk to Lance?”

“Sorry, Lance left on a training trip twenty minutes ago. Would you like to leave a message?”

“N-no…” Ash closed his pokedex worriedly. * Uh-oh… *

He began typing a furious e-mail.

**************************Insert Song Lyrics******************************

I left my head around your heart...
Why would you tear my world apart...

***********************************************************************

I don’t know how to say it,

I’m not some eloquent saint,

I wish there was an explanation,

But all I can say is, ‘there ain’t’.

So please don’t hate me now, Lance,

It’s nothing that you did.

It’s just that – I love Gary,

Why can’t you understand?

Ash

“Well, thank you for telling me this directly at least.” Lance hit the delete button on his laptop.

Dragonite nuzzled his master in concern. You’re not really going to go through with it, are you?

“Why not? Now I have proof.”

But!

“I know that it will hurt you.” Lance said clearly. “Don’t think it’s completely painless on my side either. But…”

I wish there was another way.

“Right now, there isn’t.”

You’ll think of something!

“I know I will. I’m just waiting for the second option.” Lance checked his pockets, his watch, and then took out a bottle of water.

Considering Ash’s brain, it might be a while until the next reply.

************************Insert Song Lyrics*****************************

I love you...
I hate you...
I can't live without you...
I breathe you...
I taste you...
I can't live without you...
I just can't take anymore...
this life of solitude...
I guess that i'm out the door...
and now i'm done with you...

*******************************************************************

Why do you think I hate you?

When did I imply that?

I’m merely stating, maybe, Ash,

It’s time to face the facts.

I’d like one straight answer,

Quit beating around the bush,

Do you have _any_ affection for me?

If no, then tell the truth.

Lance

“That was quick.” Ash quickly scanned the email, and then dashed off a reply. * Gomen nasai… I’m sorry… *

***********************Insert Song Lyrics******************************

I love you...
I hate you...
I can't live without you...
I just can't take anymore...
this life of solitude...
I pick myself off the floor...
and now i'm done with you...
Always...
Always...
Always...

**********************************************************************

I’m sorry, Lance.

I love Gary best.

Ash

“Well, that’s done.” Lance said cheerfully.

Gyarados cast a sideways glance at him. * Not good… *

If you’re planning to jump off that cliff over there, all of us are going to stop you.

“Who said I was doing that?” Lance asked, affronted.

Once upon a time, we were soulmates,

We soared the skies together,

But now you’ve chosen someone else

You’ll be with him forever.

So all I can say is, good luck

I hope he’ll make you happy.

Lance

Ash frowned.

Two lines missing…

Did this mean something?

Should he go find Lance and actually tell him face to face? This emailing wasn’t really getting them anywhere…

With that in mind, Ash released Charizard. “Be back in a few minutes, Gary!” He called.

Gary huffed, but nodded.

“Lance!”
The trainer looked up from where he was toasting a marshmallow over his campfire. * So he came. *

“You- I can’t believe it! You’re alive!”
“I would have said I’d die for you, but that’d be falsely sappy.” Lance quoted.

“What?”

“The missing two lines. That’s why you came, wasn’t it?”

“Er… yes?”

“Ash, I know you’ve made your choice, please don’t rescind it now. Don’t win me back with hopes of love, that’s just playing me false.”

“But…” Ash stepped forwards, only then noticing the two faint trials of tears on Lance’s face. “I…”

“I know that you don’t love me, so don’t propose to lie. Just go back to the one you chose, and let me freely fly…”

“Lance…”

“Because love itself in precious, no matter what form it takes. So go back to the one you love, before its… too late.”

“Ash! Ash!” Gary came flying up on his Pidgeot. “Don’t’ run off like that! I was worried about you!”

“Gomen nasai.” Ash apologized, as Gary hugged him.

“Are you finished?”

Ash nodded, as he took Gary’s hand. “Hai.” He closed his eyes, closed his heart, as he walked forwards to take the first step.

Goodbye…

Lance closed his eyes, steadied himself, and sighed. One step forwards.

End

Completed 10/31/04

Lance: Phantomness, I’m going to KILL YOU!

Ash: *crying*

Phantomness: Eek!
Shoyko: What? Darkfic again? Merciful mew, you work me hard…

Phantomness: Sorry. Couldn’t help it. It just wrote itself out this way.

Kairo: No humor at _all_

Pika-chan: No fluff either

Phantomness: I’m sorry, ok? Blame the plotbunny!

How this fic came into being…

I believe Roxy challenged me to write a songfic to that song I used above. Unfortunately, it’s suitable for a break up.

The poetry I wrote myself. It might be lousy poetry, but it’s mine!

Why did I break Lance and Ash up? I don’t know.

Ash deserves it probably in some way. He’s been quite stupid in some of my fics.

Um… what else?

Llorar is the Spanish verb to cry. Originally, I was going to make Ash and Lance get back together at the end, but it didn’t work out that way. That way, crying could be happy or sad. Now, it simply means that the authoress was crying while she wrote this fic! I didn’t want to break them up!

Pointless facts

- I first used Misty as Ash’s new girlfriend or boyfriend by I decided on Gary instead, once I got complaints about too much Misty abuse

- The authoress was depressed while she wrote this. That might contribute to the melancholy fic.

- Why is the title in Spanish? I thought ‘crying’ would be a title that fit.

- Guess that’s it. No, this was originally going to be a series but I decided on one-shot! Anyways, it’s done, so mail me at shadowphantomness@yahoo.com and tell me what you think!

- I think telling someone you’re breaking up directly is better than email. *Nods*