Kage’s Pokemon Author Humour Fic 2

(Kage sat on his deck chair. In front of him was another deck chair. On his lap is a piece of paper. Around the two chairs were dozens of other chairs. A Pokemon occupied each chair.)

Kage: (Picks up the piece of paper and reads in a nice, loud voice) Ok, welcome to Kage’s Pokemon Author Humour Fic. Today I am going to interview the Pokemon Authors of FF.Net. First up we have Dark Wobbuffet.

(Dark Wobbuffet comes in and sit on the deck chair in front of Kage. With him is his Jolteon, Flash.)

Kage: Welcome Dark Wobbuffet and Flash.

DW: Thanks, Kage.

Flash: Jolt! Jolt!

Kage: (waves paper around) On this piece of paper are the questions that I am going to be asking you. Now let’s begin. How old are you?

Dark Wobbuffet: 16 in normal years, 112 in dog years, and 5 in women years.

Kage: (Blinks) err, ok. Could we please have something a little more down to Earth? Any way, next question. What do you do when you are not writing a Pokemon fic?

DW: Juggling monkeys, eating bagels and jumping off the roof of my house...last one hurts though.

Kage: (blinks again) wow! That’s some life. OK, next question. How many Pokemon stories have you written?

DW: About 21 straight Pokemon fics and a bunch of Pokemon VS Digimon fics. Some of them make me go, "What the hell was I smoking?"

Kage: I’d like to know the same thing. All right, time for the next question. Are you obsessed with anything?

BW: PANTS!!! PANTZ!!! OWNZ j00!!! Oh, that and Nintendo Gamecube games.

Kage: (Backs away a little) calm down. So, you like pants. (Shakes his head a little) Crazy, Guy. Now for the next question. Have you written any Pokemon humour fics?

Dark Wobbuffet: Yes. Many. Bagels.

Kage: OK that’s great. What are they called?

DW: For the Love of Ash, April Fool’s, taming of the Sandshrew, Frasier Meets Pokemon, Who wants to be a Dragonair? How the Glitch stole Christmas, I was a teenage Hitmonchan, Pokelaw, The Pokerina of Time, Pokewood Squares, Luck of the Murkrow, (breaths in) MPT 2000-a hot time on Mt Rai, I am a Brock, An old Flame, and Team Rocket’s Retreat. (Collapses)

Kage: oops, I think I’ve killed him with all the questions. (Shrugs) Oh, well. Next question. Do you have an embarrassing moment?

DW: (gets off from the floor and sits back on the chair) Yeah. That time I wrote a fic without remembering to put on pants. >.<

Kage: (looks slightly scared) you sure are a weird guy. (Coughs and turns to Fierystreak) I hope I don’t have to interview more Pokemon Authors like him.

Fierystreak: Who knows? You just might.

Kage: (signs and faces Dark Wobbuffet and Flash) Has anyone said that you were insane?

DW: You probably should be asking who doesn't think I'm insane.

Kage: (jumps off his deck chair) ok, I’ll go ask now.

Fierystreak: (points at watch) come on, Kage. You have other Pokemon Authors to interview, so get on with it.

Kage: (sits back on his deck chair) Humph! Anyway, let’s get on with the next question. Have you written any Pokemon Poems or songs?

DW: Yeah. A parody of "I Am A Rock" called, "I Am A Brock"

Kage: How interesting. What is your favourite Pokemon Author(s) of FF.Net?

DW: Wild Growlithe, she's a great writer and I really enjoy her work.

Kage: Wow! I should read her fics. Once I learn to read, that is. What kind of personality do you have?

DW: INSANE! I AM KEFKA! KEE HEE HEE HEE!!! RESPECT THE ANTELOPE!!! GRAVY!!! (Runs around the place)

Kage: yeah, I’ve noticed that. Hey, get back here. I haven’t finished yet. What things do you hate?

DW: (finally comes to his senses and sits back down on his deck chair) Mayonnaise, cheesy B movies and Poke and yoai shipping fics. (Gets hit in the head by bricks)

Kage: Ouch! That’s gotta hurt. What is the name of your first Pokemon Fic?

DW: For the Love of Ash. In this story, Ash met a Dratini who grew a deep crush on him. I made this fic before Chikorita was introduced in the anime, as you can see since they where still in the Orange Islands at this point. SO THE WRITERS STOLE MY IDEA!!! ARGH!!! (Explodes)

Kage: (Whistles in amazement) Thank god for Author powers. (Turns to Fierystreak) Well, come on. You’re an author.

Fierystreak: (rolls her eyes) Oh, fine. (Zaps Dark Wobbuffet, who is magically joined back together. He sits back on his deck chair.)

Kage: Phew! Glad that’s over with. What is your favourite Pokemon(s)?

DW: Charizard, Poliwrath, Jolteon, Wobbuffet, Nidoking and Scizor... nough said.

Kage: (Smiles) Well, at least my full-evolved form is there. Do you have a joke to tell me?

DW: What do you call four blondes at a 4-way stop?

(Kage and everyone else look at him in confusion.)

DW: Eternity

Kage: (Laughs) Ha! Ha! That was funny! (Suddenly turns serious) I don’t get it. (Shrugs) Oh, well. Next question. If you could change one thing on Earth, what would it be?

DW: For Grey Davis to be a moose.

Kage: (blinks) um, ok. Would you like to ask me a non-personal question?

DW: Where's the beef?

Kage: Weird question. Um, go look in the fridge. I’m sure it’ll have plenty of meat in there. Any way thanks Dark Wobbuffet and Flash for joining this interview. Could you please sit on one of those other empty deck chairs? (Points to an empty deck chair)

(Dark Wobbuffet and Flash walk up towards the deck chair and sits down.)

Kage: OK that was weird. OK, our next Pokemon Author is Flower Powerer.

(Flower waves to the audience. Next to her is her Typhlosion, Ty. She sits on the deck chair that DW was on earlier.)

Kage: Thanks for coming, Flower. OK, first question. How old are you?

Flower: 12 (Sniff) So young.

Kage: Aw, come on. Fierystreak is 15. You’re hardly any younger then her. (Gives Flower a comforting pat on the knee.) OK, question number two. What do you do when you are not writing a Pokemon fic?

Flower: Playing with Ty (Huggles), doing my Bellossom dances (Dances), or just...you know...sitting there.

Kage: Sounds exciting. How many Pokemon stories have you written?

Flower: Lesse: There was Betrayal Between Friends, Fury Cutter, Ty's Human Quest, Bulbasaur Rules So Get Over It, Rocket Girl...and of course The Interactive Pokemon Game Show! So that's...6

Kage: (Jumps up and done on his deck chair.) Ooooh! The Interactive Pokemon Game Show! I love that fic. Of course, I can’t read, so Fierystreak reads it to me. (Sits back down again.) Are you obsessed with anything?

Flower: Pokemon. Yu-Gi-Oh. Getting Taylor and Michael together, but you didn't need to know that.

Kage: (Nods) Yeah, I didn’t need to know that. Have you written any Pokemon humour fics?

Flower: Yeppers.

Kage: Yeppers? That’s a different answer from the usual yes. What are they called?

Flower: Ty's Human Quest, Bulbasaur Rules, So Get Over It and The Interactive Pokemon Game Show!

Kage: Cool. Fierystreak’s written two humour fics. This one and Legendary Crazy. (Signs) I don’t think she is having much luck with Legendary Crazy. Not many people have reviewed, but we’re not here to talk about that. Do you have an embarrassing moment?

Flower: Nope. Not at all. (Falls down) Nope!

Kage: (Laughs) Crazy human. (Turns to Fierystreak.) Hey, Fiery. I think I’ve thought of a new humour fic- Human Crazy. Just like the title from Legendary Crazy.

Fierystreak: I’ll keep that in mind.

Kage: Has anyone said that you were insane?

Flower: (Giggles) Yep!

Kage: Yep, I’d have to agree with them. Have you written any Pokemon Poems or songs?

Flower: Nopers.

Kage: Weird answer. What is your favourite Pokemon Author(s) of FF.Net?

Flower: Lccorp2, The Crimson Lugia, and of course, ME!

Kage: (Looks confused) I don’t know a Pokemon Author called ME.

Fierystreak: She means ME as in herself.

Kage: Oh. (Turns back to Flower) What kind of personality do you have?

Flower: Lessee...I'm smart (Glows with pride) somewhat insane, uh...nice...and uh...yeah.

Kage: Insane? Yeah, I knew that. What things do you hate?

Flower: I hate MewChus that try to take over my fics. And pizza and tacos. (Shudders)

Kage: (Whistles) what is the name of your first Pokemon Fic?

Flower: Betrayal between Friends (Winces) So many flames...

Kage: Right, I haven’t read that one yet. What is your favourite Pokemon(s)?

Flower: TYPHLOSION! And Bellossom!

Ty: I thought you only liked us Typhlosions...

Flower: But then I turned into a Bellossom! (Does the Bellossom dance)

Kage: Charmanders are better. (Points to himself) That’s what I am. Do you have a joke to tell me?

Flower: Nope. No wait: Yeah no. Me not good with jokes. (Cries)

Kage: (Hands her a tissue) yeah, I’m no good at jokes either. Look, I’ll show you. Why did the Charmander cross the road? See? I’m a Charmander and even I don’t know the answer. (Signs deeply) Oh, well. If you could change one thing on Earth, what would it be?

Flower: (stands tall like a Miss America contestant) World Peace!!!

Kage: You got that right. I am not getting any World Peace sitting around here. Would you like to ask me a non-personal question?

Flower: Sure. Uh...what's it like being a Charmander? Is that too personal? Waz that it? Okies! Thankies for letting me on you fic!!!

Kage: Being a Charmander is great. A lot of Pokemon fans say I’m cute. Yep, that’s the last question and you’re welcome, Flower. (Points at a deck chair next to Dark Wobbuffet) Please sit over there.

(Flower and Ty walk towards the deck chair and sit down)

Kage: Well that was interesting. Ok, next we have Lccorp2. I think he’s surpose to be a Ware-Umbreon. (Shrugs) Any way, let’s welcome Lccorp2.

(Lccorp2 walks towards the empty deck chair in front of Kage. By his side is Silver the shiny Umbreon.)

Kage: Ok, let’s start off with the first usual question. How old are you?

Lccorp2: 15.

Kage: That was a simple answer. What do you do when you are not writing a Pokemon fic?

Lccorp2: play computer games.

Kage: You sure are straight to the point. How many Pokemon stories have you written?

Lccorp2: 4.

Kage: Are you obsessed with anything?

Lccorp2: well...(blushes)

Kage: (Grins evilly) That must mean you are obsessed with something. I wonder what it is. (Grows serious) Have you written any Pokemon humour fics?

Lccorp2: of course, all of my fics are intended to make people laugh.

Kage: Well, this one is surpose to make people laugh. What are they called?

Lccorp2: go look yourself. Bleah.

Kage: ok, I will later on. Do you have an embarrassing moment?

Lccorp2: of course...but I'm not telling you!

Kage: ok then. I have one, too, but I’m not telling you either. Has anyone said that you were insane?

Lccorp2: OF COURSE!

Kage: (Giggles) I’ve been interviewing three insane Pokemon authors. Have you written any Pokemon Poems or songs?

Lccorp2: nope...

Kage: Mmmm! Interesting. What is your favourite Pokemon Author(s) of FF.Net?

Lccorp2: all my fans...

Kage: What kind of personality do you have?

Lccorp2: deranged. You don't wanna know more.

Kage: Er, I’ll take your advice. What things do you hate?

Lccorp2: uncomfortable clothes, hot weather, rain, Mondays, the list goes on...

Kage: Well, we haven’t got time to hear it, so I better get on with the next question. What is the name of your first Pokemon Fic?

Lccorp2: Eskimo Jolteon, the first insane series ever!

Kage: Insane is right. That is one crazy fic. What is your favourite Pokemon(s)?

Lccorp2: do I have to say more? Umbreon!

Kage: I should have guessed. Do you have a joke to tell me?

Lccorp2: ...nope, if it has to be clean...

Kage: (Nods) that’s right. This is a G-rated fic. If you could change one thing on Earth, what would it be?

Lccorp2: I'd make everyone worship me.

Kage: Yeah, well, that is not going to happen. Would you like to ask me a non-personal question?

Lccorp2: is the world going to explode in three minutes?

Kage: More like in three seconds. I don’t know. I don’t think so. Hope not. Well, that’s it for Lccorp2. Thanks for joining. Please sit next to Flower.

(Lccorp2 sits next to Flower on a deck chair. Silver is also with him.)

Kage: Well that went swell. OK, fokes lets welcome our forth guest Martial Arts Master and his Wobbuffet.

(Everyone claps as MAM and his Wobbuffet enter the cave. Martial Arts Master sits on the deck chair in front of Kage.)

Kage: Welcome to the both of you. Let’s begin shell we. What is your age?

Martial Arts Master: I am 17.

Kage: OK, so far you’re the oldest here. What do you do when you are not writing a Pokemon fic?

Martial Arts Master: I do schoolwork when I am not writing a Pokemon fanfic. That, or relax.

Kage: School work and relax? Is that all? (Shakes his head a little) OK, on with next question. How many Pokemon stories have you written?

Martial Arts Master: I've written 19 Pokemon stories.

Kage: 19 Pokemon stories? I can’t even write one. (Coughs) Well...um...that’s because I can’t spell. Are you obsessed with anything?

Martial Arts Master: No, I am not obsessed with anything.

Kage: (Looks surprised) Huh? You’re not obsessed with anything? Everyone has to be obsessed about something. (Shrugs) Oh, well. Have you written any Pokemon humour fics?

Martial Arts Master: No, I have not written any Pokemon humour fics.

Kage: What? Gee, that’s disappointing. Do you have an embarrassing moment?

Martial Arts Master: Yes, the time I accidentally wandered into the girls' locker room. Luckily the girls were still in their bathing suits.

Kage: What do you mean lucky? You should be disappointed! (Coughs loudly) OK, whatever. Has anyone said that you were insane?

Martial Arts Master: No, no one has said I'm insane.

Kage: Well I’m the first one then. You’re insane. (Laughs maniacally) Have you written any Pokemon Poems or songs?

Martial Arts Master: No, I have not written any Pokemon poems or songs.

Kage: Oh, OK. What is your favourite Pokemon Author(s) of FF.Net?

Martial Arts Master: I do not really have a favourite Pokemon author, although there are a few I like a little more than the others.

Kage: Mmmm. Good enough. What kind of personality do you have?

Martial Arts Master: I'm normally passive, but I get riled up if I think something's unfair. I support tolerance of all religions, tolerance of all races, etc., etc.

Kage: Good personality. What things do you hate?

Martial Arts Master: I basically hate anything unfair.

Kage: (Nods) Yeah. Me, too. What is the name of your first Pokemon Fic?

Martial Arts Master: The name of my first Pokemon fic was Team Rocket's Entrance.

Kage: I haven’t read that yet. Maybe I should. (Shrugs) What is your favourite Pokemon(s)?

Martial Arts Master: My favourite Pokemon is Wobbuffet.

Kage: Wobbuffet? (Mumbles) I wonder why? Do you have a joke to tell me?

Martial Arts Master: Here's a joke for you, and I heard this from elsewhere:

Joke teller: What's frozen tea?

Joke listener: Iced tea.

Joke teller: What's frozen beer?

Joke listener: Iced beer.

Joke teller: What's frozen ink?

Joke listener: Iced ink.

Joke teller: Then go and have a bath!

Get it? The joke is that "iced ink" sounds like "I stink".

Kage: (Laughs) Funny. I get it, but I wouldn’t have if you didn’t tell me. If you could change one thing on Earth, what would it be?

Martial Arts Master: If I could change one thing on earth, I'd eradicate bigotry.

Kage: Mmmm! You know what I would do? (Shrugs) Well at the moment I don’t know myself. Would you like to ask me a non-personal question?

Martial Arts Master: would you like to evolve someday?

Kage: (Shrugs) to tell you the truth, I haven’t even thought about it. I’m level 5, but Fierystreak already has a Charmander that’s past the evolved level, so I don’t know if she would want to train me. (Thinks about it for a bit) Yeah, I would like to evolve someday, but not just yet. Well that was the last question. Thanks for your time and please go sit next to Lccorp2 and Silver. Ok, next we have Blissy and his Blissey Nurse Joy.

(Blissy and Nurse Joy walked silently inside the cave and Blissey sits on the deck chair while NJ stands up.)

Kage: Welcome. Will start of with the first question. What is your age?

Blissy: 18

Kage: Well you’re now the oldest Pokemon Author of FF.Net that I have interviewed so far. What do you do when you are not writing a Pokemon fic?

Blissy: Play video games, read pokemon fics, and eat. Which is probably why I weigh more than a Snorlax!

Kage: (Laughs loudly) My friend, Fierystreak eats a lot, but she’s still skinny. But she’s not anorexic. How many Pokemon stories have you written?

Blissy: 24,000

Kage: Yikes! That’s way too many. Are you obsessed with anything?

Blissy: Video games, M2, and Fanfiction.net

Kage: Have you written any Pokemon humour fics?

Blissy: Yes

Kage: What are they called?

Blissy: Ask Nurse Joy!

Nurse Joy: Blissey!

Kage: Huh? What is that surpose to mean? (Shrugs) Oh, well. Do you have an embarrassing moment?

Blissy: Once I accidentally walked into a women's restroom.

Kage: (grins) Wow! I bet you were pleased. Too bad the ladies weren’t. Or did they see you? Has anyone said that you were insane?

Blissy: Just about everyone!

Kage: so, if I say you were insane, will that make it everyone? (Shrugs) OK, I’m going to say it. You’re insane. (Laughs for a few minutes and then gets serious again) Have you written any Pokemon Poems or songs?

Blissy: No

Kage: Oh. Never mind then. What is your favourite Pokemon Author(s) of FF.Net?

Blissy: M2 and Kuromew!

Kage: What kind of personality do you have?

Blissy: Same as a Blissey.

Kage: A personality like a Blissey? Now there is something you don’t see every day. But I surpose you mean caring like one. What things do you hate?

Blissy: People who go too far in bashing characters I hate, anyone who doesn't think this is a great fic and idea, and Dr. Nick. Also people who flame me.

Fierystreak: Thanks Blissy. I think your fics are great, too.

Kage: (Smiles) People who flame you? Well you’re in luck. I haven’t even learned Ember yet, let alone my other Fire-type moves, so I can’t flame you. What is the name of your first Pokemon Fic?

Blissy: I can't remember.

Kage: Um, you could have checked. Never mind. What is your favourite Pokemon(s)?

Blissy: Blissey and Mew practically tie for first.

Kage: I here that Mew’s are powerful. It’s kind of weird considering that they’re small. You know, Mews can learn any HM and TM, but they can learn every nature move. For instance they can’t learn Thundershock or Double Kick, because they aren’t HMs or TMs. It would be great if there was a Pokemon that could learn every single move. Do you have a joke to tell me?

Blissy: What did the snail say when he was on the turtle?

Kage: I don’t know. What did the snail say when he was on the turtle?

Blissy: I hate these speed demons!

Kage: (Rolls his eyes and laughs a little) Ooookkkkk! (Turns to Fierystreak) Whose crazy idea was this?

Fierystreak: (Grins) Yours actually, Kage.

Kage: oh yeah. (Coughs and turns back towards Blissy and Nurse Joy) If you could change one thing on Earth, what would it be?

Blissy: All the people and animals would be transformed into pokemon!

Kage: (Looks at Fierystreak and grins) that would be useful. It’ll be much easier if Fierystreak was turned into a Charmander. Then we could play together. She won’t be able to train her Pokemon, though. (Turns to Fierystreak again) Hey, Fiery, would will your cat Belle change into?

Fierystreak: (Shrugs) I’m not sure. Maybe a Meowth or a Persian. Maybe even another cat-like Pokemon.

Kage: Yeah probably. Ok, back to the questions. This is the last one. Would you like to ask Kage a non-personal question?

Blissy: (picks up a watermelon) May I eat this?

Kage: (Blinks) Er, sure. OK, you two. Go sit next to the Martial Arts Master and his Wobbuffet. (Signs and shakes his head a little) Next time someone else can interview the Pokemon Authors of FF.Net. These guys give me a headache. All right let’s get this over and done with. Please welcome Tigga Tigga L.S I hope I got that right.

(Tigga Tigga L.S comes inside the cave and sits down on the deck chair. On her lap is her boy Elekid named Eli and a female Magby named Maggie.)

Kage: I thought Magbies could only be male. (Shrugs) Oh well. This is only a fic. How old are you?

Tigga Tigga L.S: 15.

Kage: What do you do when you are not writing a Pokemon fic?

Tigga Tigga L.S: I meditate, listen to Sarah McLaughlin before bed, and blare my rock, rap, dance, etc music in my portable cd player everywhere else. I also write poetry.

Kage: Poetry. Excellent. I should read them. How many Pokemon stories have you written?

Tigga Tigga L.S: a couple. 3 or so.

Kage: Are you obsessed with anything?

Tigga Tigga L.S: I’m obsessed with my Santa Claus hat! I wear it everywhere. I’m also obsessed with the colour purple. Dark, not light. I even have purple highlights in my hair.

Kage: I’m obsessed with the colour red. See? I’m covered with it. Have you written any Pokemon humour Fics?

Tigga Tigga L.S: I’ve tried, but I don't have the guts to show them to anyone.

Kage: Arg! That’s bad. (Starts thinking about the time when he tried a humour fiction and winches) Do you have an embarrassing moment?

Tigga Tigga L.S: I slept over at my friend’s house and sleptwalked into her older brother’s bedroom! I even woke up at the foot of his bed.

Kage: Yike! I hope he didn’t see you. Has anyone said that you were insane?

Tigga Tigga L.S: I tell everyone that I am, but no one believes me. I fake sanity.

Kage: (Looks amused.) I believe you. I also fake sanity. Sometimes I don’t even know weather I’m sane or not. Have you written any Pokemon Poems or songs?

Tigga Tigga L.S: no, but i do write poetry.

Kage: What is your favourite Pokemon Author(s) of FF.Net?

Tigga Tigga L.S: any author who writes GOOD fic with Gary in it. Not when he is a moron being the antagonist, but when he's written a bit deeper. When he's nice. They are my favourite authors!

Kage: Ah! A Gary-lover. Haven’t heard of one of those for a while. What kind of personality do you have?

Tigga Tigga L.S: i am the stereotyped outcast, loner, and quiet girl. I’m really smart, and if you get to know me you'll learn about my witty humour. Tasteful and classy sometimes filled with sarcasm.

Kage: Too bad you’re not using your witty humour here. It might be interesting. What things do you hate?

Tigga Tigga L.S: i hate tomatoes! Even pizza cannot have tomato sauce. Instead, i have Italian salad dressing. It’s just as good!

Kage: Italian salad dressing on pizza? I’ve never even heard off it. What is the name of your first Pokemon Fic?

Tigga Tigga L.S: the mistakes humanity made.

Kage: It should’ve been called the mistakes Pokemon made. I mean, we should have never obeyed humans in the first place. Look what they’re making us do now. Some authors are even writing us in crazy Pokemon stories. What is your favourite Pokemon(s)?

Tigga Tigga L.S: Umbreon, ampharos, Raikou and sneazel are #1. Elekid is #2.

Kage: Aw! You don’t like Charmanders. (Looks hurt) Do you have a joke to tell me?

Tigga Tigga L.S: I have a funny quote from 'life, the universe, and everything' by Douglas Adam "there is a knack to flying. The knack lies in throwing yourself at the ground and missing. Pick a nice day and try it.

Kage: Sure, but that’s only if I have nothing else better to do. If you could change one thing on Earth, what would it be?

Tigga Tigga L.S: I’d make it so ice cream wouldn't melt when left in the sun too long. I’d also make it so your hands wouldn't get sticky after holding a sugar doughnut too long.

Kage: Would you like to ask me a non-personal question?

Tigga Tigga L.S: Do you have a girlfriend cuz Maggies interested? Just kidding.

Kage: (Looks relieved) Phew! Thank god for that. We may both be Fire-types, but I’m still not interested. And about the girlfriend thing, I don’t have one. And at the moment, I don’t have a crush on any female Charmander or any other female Pokemon. Any way thanks Tigga Tigga L.S for coming in today and we all hope to see you next time. You and your two Pokemon can sit next to Blissy and Nurse Joy.

(Tigga Tigga L.S waves to the audience as she and her Pokemon walk away to sit on one of the deck chairs.)

Kage: Well that turned out all right. (Checks his watch) 4:20 PM and just one more authors to interview. Please welcome Hanni B!

(Hanni B and her Charmander Charmer come into the cave. Hanni B sits on the deck chair in front of Kage while Charmer sits on her lap.)

Kage: Oh looksee! Another Charmander! Its a male, but that’s OK. (Sees everyone giving him shocked looks) No, I’m not gay. I meant, because he’s still my type. Maybe we can play together after the interviews. (Coughs) OK, that’s it. I better stop before I bore myself and everyone else. Welcome Hanni B and Charmer. (Rolls his eyes and says in a bored tone) We shall begin with the usual question. How old are you?

Hanni B: 15

Kage: What do you do when you’re not writing a Pokemon Fic?

Hanni B: Drawing

Kage: How interesting. (Turns to crowd) No I mean that, really. (Turns back to Hanni B and Charmer)

Charmer: Charmander-Char?

Kage: What are you here for? (Shrugs) Good question. I thought that the interviewers would like to bring a Pokemon. I’m sure you guys will get a big part some time. Just be patient.

Charmer: Char. (Sits back in his chair, satisfied)

Kage: Now on to the neck question. How many Pokemon Stories have you written?

Hanni B: 6

Charmer: (Shows six of his fingers) Der!

Kage: Yes, Charmer. That’s six. Now please strop interrupting. (Waits for a few seconds just in case Charmer wants to say anything else) Good. Are you obsessed with anything?

Hanni B: My muse, Coltrane. And occasionally Ash.

Charmer: (Happily) Chaaaaaaaaaaaaaarr!

Kage: (Looks confused) what are you so happy about? Oh never mind. Don’t bother. I’ve had better conversations with dirt. Have you written any Pokemon humour Fics?

Hanni B: Yep!

Kage: what are they called?

Hanni B: Result of Lemon Drops at 2:30 a.m. and Ash's Incredible Directions!

Kage: Ash’s Incredible Digestions?

Hanni B: Directions not digestions!

Kage: Oh. Well why didn’t you say so in the first place?

Hanni B: (Groans) I did.

Charmer: (Laughs)

Kage: Do you have an embarrassing moment?

Hanni B: Yes, when I walked into the boy’s locker room by mistake. (Blushes)

Kage: (Laughs) Most of the authors I’ve reviewed today has done that. Has anyone said that you were insane?

Hanni B: All the time.

Kage: Wow! There are quiet a lot of insane Pokemon authors of FF.Net. Have you written any Pokemon Poems or songs?

Hanni B: Yes, but I haven't posted any.

Kage: Well, you should. I want to read them. What is your favourite Pokemon Author(s) of > FF.Net?

Hanni B: Sk8er Grl. Formerly known as PinkScyther

Kage: I should read her stories if you think they’re that good. What kind of personality do you have?

Hanni B: Hyperactive, but sensible.

Kage: Hyperactive and sensible? What a weird combination. (Laughs loudly) What things do you hate?

Hanni B: Mary-Sues, kids that act like big shots.

Kage: (Blinks) Yeah me, too. What is the name of your first Pokemon Fic?

Hanni B: Result of Lemon Drops at 2:30 a.m.

Kage: (Checks his watch) Well, it’s past 2:30 am. It’s now 5: 20 pm and come to think of it. It’s almost my lunch break. (Shrugs as if it no big deal) What is your favourite Pokemon(s)?

Hanni B: Clefairy.

Kage: (Outraged) Then why did you bring a Charmander?

Charmer: (Laughs)

Kage: (Muttering) Oh, shut up. Next question. Do you have a joke to tell me?

Hanni B: Not as of now. Sorry.

Kage: (Looks disappointed) Aw. Not many authors have jokes. If you could change one thing on Earth, what would it be?

Hanni B: I would find a way to stop the terrorists in the Middle East.

Kage: (Yells loudly) Terrorists in the Middle East stop what you’re doing and piss off! (Calms down) There, I think I did it for you. (Rubs his hands together) OK, next question. Would you like to ask me a non-personal question?

Hanni B: What's your opinion on the Charific Valley?

Kage: Actually, I’ve never been there. So, I really don’t know what’s it like. I’ve only been in this world for a few weeks or so. OK, that’s it for today. Thanks for coming in Hanni B and Charmer. Before we leave I want to do one thing. If you were interviewed in this chapter I want you to give me one Basic Pokemon. No legendaries and no Pokemon that don’t evolve. You can tell me what you want by review and e-mail. OK, see ya next time on Kage’s Pokemon Humour Fic. (Waves good bye to the audience)

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Well, that’s it for this episode. I hope you enjoyed it. Don't forget to send me some feedback.