DISCLAIMER- Niether The Author or the WE 'R' GR8 channel holds any legal tenancy over pokemon, the pokemon company, or any other related trademarks. -------------------------------------------------BRIEFING--------------------------------------------------------- Chattercube- 10/11/05- STUDIO 13 The Chattercube Chat Show- DRAFT SCRIPT- for revision by screeners- Take 7 Editor's Note: If you guys scrow up one more take, you're out on yer arses! This is yer last chance, don't waste it Tezza! ----------------------------------------------------INTRO------------------------------------------------------ Terry.S: And our special guests tonight are straight from the new rock band sensation, Medicinal Fish! Ash Ketchum- Pallet Town pokemon failure- Lead singer Tarquin Dafyid- Pewter dirt collector and proud gay- Drummer Misty Waterflower- Water type trainer- 4th sensatioal sister-bass guitarist Delia Ketchum- Presenter of the Crazy Culinary TV show- Backing Vocals Brock Slate- Former Pewter gym leader- air guitar + smoking ----------------------------------------------------MAIN-------------------------------------------------------- Tonight our subject is 'Life's a Bastard', brought to you live on the WE 'R' GR8 channel, by me, Terry Spegreenich. Terry.S: So, lets start with you Ash, how was your life before Medicinal Fish? Ash.K: My life was okay, er, i guess.... Terry.S: Great, so how about enlightening us Ash, I hear you wanted to be a pokemon master. Ash.K: Um, yeah.. I got pikachu first, and well, then er.. Terry.s: Right then! So before the band, Ash was a wanabe pokemon trainer! Weren't we all though! Delia, could you give us a few words on Ash as a child? Delia.K: Yes, of course dear, Ash was always really springy, once when he was about five, I found him sitting in one of my cake mixes ten seconds before we went on air! We all panicked, and eventually had to go for a long advert break to get the set cleaned up after Ash insisted on taking half the cake mix with him! Terry.s: I know the feeling! Never work with annoying bratty kids or smelly anima.. Delia.K: What did you say about my Ashy! You take that back right now! He doesn't smell that bad at all! Ash.K: Mom! Stoppid! Delia.K: Sorry dear. But while we're on the subject of my show, why not buy the new book! Crazy Cullinary- Cracking Cuisine is only $29.99, plus an obscure amount of tax! All your cooking needs answered in one simple six hundred page book! Don't delay, Order today! Terry.S: Err.... Thankyou Delia! Next we move on to a famed local college boy, Tarquin Dafyid. So tarquin, tell us about yourself. Tarq.D: Well ducky, I came from ireland originally, then daddy hit mummy with a belt, and we moved to tenbi. Then daddy lost his job there and got sent to prison for violent decappitation of other person(s) or something. Stupid Services sent meto a college, and here I am. Terry.S: G...Great Tarquin, how did you join the band? Tarq.D: Oooh, thought you'de never ask! Well, I heard some guy at the YMCA saying about a band, and I always wanted to be in the public eye, so I auditioned and signed up!.... Misty.W: Oh yeah, Right! You came to me one afternoon, begging like a dog for us to let you on! Tarq.D: Well, something like that... Brock.S: Yeah that's right! If I signed him up, he even said he'd give me a... Misty.W: OKAY! Okay brock, we get the picture! Brock.S: Sorry guys. Terrys.S: So, er, guys, what would your response be to this famous proverb. Life is like mashed potatoes- Get to the good stuff, but avoid the lumps. Ash, why don't you start us off? Ash.K: I like potatoes..... Boy, I could really go for a pack of potatoe chips right now.... Terry.S: Well, thanks again Ash...(What did I do to deserve this?)...You next Delia- Delia.K: Well, the saying doesn't mean a lot to me, but in my new book, there are over fifty potato based recipies, including such favourites as pineapple and potato pie, Potato pick up an go for the kids, Plutonium Potatoes with glowing goodness, porcupine pota... Ash.K: And potato waffles, I like waffles. Hey anyone got any waffles? Waffles needed on set! Delia.K: Ashy, you know it's rude to interrupt... Ashy.K: Sorry mom.... Can I have some waffles when we get home? Delia.K: Sure dear. Terry.S: Er, sure, great, whatever. Okay ten let's get on with it... You net Misty. Misty.W: Well, It means to me you guys have a pretty shoddy script writer, I mean come on, Potatoes? Terry.S: (Damn you people) And FINALLY, Brock... Brock.S: Oh, right, okay, I dunno really, gues I don't really like potatoes all that much... Terry.S: AAAARGH! YOU PEOPLE AREN'T EVEN CAPIBLE OF RATIONAL THOUGHT! GET OFF MY SET! OFF! NOW! Delia.K: Well there's no need to shout dear... Terry.S:GET OFF!!! ---------------------------------------------------------------------END-------------------------------------- Editor's end notes- Can you guys screw things up any more! GET OFF MY STUDIOS AND NEVER COME BACK! Bloody amatures. You owe me seven rolls of film! -Mr.J.Rumbleguts, CEO